Alexander Kurlyandsky “Well, wait a minute! or Two for One" (PDF). Book: “Well, wait a minute! Or Two for One" Alexander Kurlyandsky Hare - a brave soldier
HELLO GUYS!
You've probably seen the movie "WELL, WAIT!"
About the Wolf and the Hare.
In this book you will also meet the Wolf and the Hare.
But not only with them.
Also with the Bunny’s parents - his father is a doctor and his mother is a teacher.
And with his grandmother, a farmer.
And with the deceiver Lisa.
And with the most real Gray Wolf from a real fairy tale.
Whose name is Kuzma.
And with Baba Yaga, also real.
And with Behemoth, who became one of the main participants in our history.
And with many other heroes.
You probably guessed it?
Yes! This book is about the BRAND NEW, UNKNOWN ADVENTURES OF THE WOLF AND THE HARE.
Now two Wolves are chasing our Bunny.
And I won’t say how it all ends. Otherwise, you will not be interested in reading the book.
Chapter One
WHY DO NOT WOLVES LIKE HARES?
The bunny lived in an ordinary large-block house.
In the same way as many of his fellow citizens: Deer, Hippos, Rams, Badgers, Bears, Goats. Workers and employees, writers and scientists, businessmen and...
No. Businessmen did not live in such houses. And if they lived, they were not very respectable.
In winter, snowflakes flew into the cracks between the blocks. And you could ski in the rooms. And in the summer the blocks got so hot that it was easy to fry cutlets on them. Press with the back of the pan and fry. The cutlets sizzled and splashed fat in all directions. But they turned out very tasty. Can't compare with any restaurants. It was getting hot in the apartment - no need to go south. Dive into your bath, if there is water, and consider that you are on the sea coast. And if there is no water, it’s also not scary. Can be dialed during rain. The roof leaked so much that on any floor there was knee-deep water.
A large-block house is good for everyone!
But most importantly, he teaches residents to overcome difficulties!
It was in such a house, on the third floor, that Bunny lived.
The Bunny's family was small but hardworking.
His mother, Zaychikha, worked as a teacher in kindergarten. And dad, Hare, is a doctor in a children's clinic. Both dad and mom raised and treated other people's children. They did not have enough time for their own son. So the Bunny had to take care of himself. Wash your hands before eating, cook soup from bags, brush your shoes and teeth.
All this taught him to be independent.
And if you remember that Bunny lived in a large-block house, then it becomes clear where he got his dexterity, ingenuity and ability to find a way out of the most difficult situations.
On that ill-fated day when our story began, the Bunny did not think about anything bad. Summer was ahead, the holidays. A trip to visit grandma in the village. The screams of children from their mother’s kindergarten could be heard through the window. It smelled like medicine from my dad's clinic. At such moments you think only about good things. That you are healthy and you don’t need to be treated by your dad. And that you are already an adult. You don't have to go to your mom's kindergarten.
“Summer, ah, summer!.. Red summer, be with me.”
Grandma's village is full of mushrooms. And what fishing!
Eh, it’s good to live in the world!
The only thing that spoiled the mood was the Wolf. From the second entrance. A notorious hooligan. All his life he studied in the third grade, and smoked from the first. As soon as he sees the Bunny, immediately follow him! I had to not yawn and quickly move away.
Then, having caught his breath, Bunny thought:
"What did I do wrong to him?" Or: “Why don’t Wolves like us?”
He asked dad and mom. But they avoided a direct answer.
"When you grow up big, you'll know."
Or:
“The main thing, son, is to study well.”
One day the Bunny decided to make friends with the Wolf. I bought his favorite dromedary camel cigarettes.
He held out and said:
-Smoke. This is for you.
The wolf took the cigarettes. I lit a cigarette. And then he looked at the Bunny in a bad way:
-Do you know that smoking is harmful?
“I know,” said the Bunny.
-You know, you’re slipping it to me. Do you want to poison?
-What do you?
- said the Bunny.
- I want to be friends with you.
The wolf grinned:
-Then - here we go. Light up.
And he handed the pack to the Bunny.
“It’s early for me,” said the Bunny.
- My mother doesn’t allow me.
“And I allow it,” said the Wolf.
- So tell your mom.
What was to be done? The bunny took a cigarette.
The wolf clicked his lighter. He brought the flame to his very face:
-Come on, come on. Take a drag!
The bunny inhaled thick acrid smoke. It was as if a bomb had exploded inside him.
He coughed. The cigarette shot out of his mouth like a rocket from a launcher.
The wolf screamed, throwing off her burning debris.
The Bunny no longer tried to make friends with the Wolf. When she sees his stooped figure, legs in hands - and full speed ahead!
The bunny got up from the sofa and went to the balcony. "Can you see the Wolf?"
No, it doesn't seem to be visible. You can go for a walk.
Oh! He forgot to water the flowers! Mom asked.
The bunny returned to the room. I took a watering can from the kitchen. I filled it with water from a special jar “For flowers”.
He went out onto the balcony again.
And how many weeds there are among the flowers!
He placed the watering can on the concrete floor. He returned to the room again. I found my mother's scissors that she used to cut weeds.
And the Bunny did not see that the Wolf had been watching him from behind the bushes for a long time. That he tore the clothesline off the poles. He threw it like a lasso over the television antenna. And climbs up it, onto his balcony. And he whistles another song:
"If... a friend... suddenly appeared..."
Bunny didn't see any of this. He was busy: he was cutting off the insolent weeds.
“What kind of weed is this? Thick as a rope! It doesn’t belong here!”
Bunny - right! And he cut it off.
And it really was a rope.
And the Wolf flew down! Straight into a police wheelchair.
Perhaps he would not have ended up in the carriage. But just at that moment the blind Behemoth was crossing the street.
He went to order glasses. On the ground floor of the large-block building there was a pharmacy, specializing in glasses. And Behemoth had a recipe. According to which, as a pensioner, he was entitled to free glasses at this special pharmacy.
And he walked, rejoicing that soon he would be able to see everything well with his new glasses. Even your small pension.
But now he was without glasses and did not see the motorcycle.
The motorcycle squealed on its brakes, swerved sharply to the side and drove onto the sidewalk. Just where the Wolf fell.
That's why the Wolf landed right in the police wheelchair.
If it weren't for Behemoth, he would never have gotten there.
And that’s why the Wolf shouted with all his might to the whole street:
-WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
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HELLO GUYS!
You've probably seen the movie "WELL, WAIT!"
About the Wolf and the Hare.
In this book you will also meet the Wolf and the Hare.
But not only with them.
Also with the Bunny’s parents - his father is a doctor and his mother is a teacher.
And with his grandmother, a farmer.
And with the deceiver Lisa.
And with a real Gray Wolf from a real fairy tale.
Whose name is Kuzma.
And with Baba Yaga, also real.
And with Behemoth, who became one of the main participants in our history.
And with many other heroes.
You probably guessed it?
Yes! This book is about the BRAND NEW, UNKNOWN ADVENTURES OF THE WOLF AND THE HARE.
Now two Wolves are chasing our Bunny.
And I won’t say how it all ends. Otherwise, you will not be interested in reading the book.
Chapter One
WHY DO NOT WOLVES LIKE HARES?
The bunny lived in an ordinary large-block house.
In the same way as many of his fellow citizens: Deer, Hippos, Rams, Badgers, Bears, Goats. Workers and employees, writers and scientists, businessmen and...
No. Businessmen did not live in such houses. And if they lived, they were not very respectable.
In winter, snowflakes flew into the cracks between the blocks. And you could ski in the rooms. And in the summer the blocks got so hot that it was easy to fry cutlets on them. Press with the back of the pan and fry. The cutlets sizzled and splashed fat in all directions. But they turned out very tasty. Can't compare with any restaurants. It was getting hot in the apartment - no need to go south. Dive into your bath, if there is water, and consider that you are on the sea coast. And if there is no water, it’s also not scary. Can be dialed during rain. The roof leaked so much that on any floor there was knee-deep water.
A large-block house is good for everyone!
But most importantly, he teaches residents to overcome difficulties!
It was in such a house, on the third floor, that Bunny lived.
The Bunny's family was small but hardworking.
His mother, Zaychikha, worked as a kindergarten teacher. And dad, Hare, is a doctor in a children's clinic. Both dad and mom raised and treated other people's children. They did not have enough time for their own son. So the Bunny had to take care of himself. Wash your hands before eating, cook soup from bags, brush your shoes and teeth.
All this taught him to be independent.
And if you remember that Bunny lived in a large-block house, then it becomes clear where he got his dexterity, ingenuity and ability to find a way out of the most difficult situations.
On that ill-fated day when our story began, the Bunny did not think about anything bad. Summer was ahead, the holidays. A trip to visit grandma in the village. The screams of children from their mother’s kindergarten could be heard through the window. It smelled like medicine from my dad's clinic. At such moments you think only about good things. That you are healthy and you don’t need to be treated by your dad. And that you are already an adult. You don't have to go to your mom's kindergarten.
“Summer, ah, summer!.. Red summer, be with me.”
Grandma's village is full of mushrooms. And what fishing!
Eh, it’s good to live in the world!
The only thing that spoiled the mood was the Wolf. From the second entrance. A notorious hooligan. All his life he studied in the third grade, and smoked from the first. As soon as he sees the Bunny, immediately follow him! I had to not yawn and quickly move away.
Then, having caught his breath, Bunny thought:
"What did I do wrong to him?" Or: “Why don’t Wolves like us?”
He asked dad and mom. But they avoided a direct answer.
"When you grow up big, you'll know."
“The main thing, son, is to study well.”
One day the Bunny decided to make friends with the Wolf. I bought his favorite dromedary camel cigarettes.
He held out and said:
Smoke. This is for you.
The wolf took the cigarettes. I lit a cigarette. And then he looked at the Bunny in a bad way:
Do you know that smoking is harmful?
“I know,” said the Bunny.
You know, but you’re slipping it to me. Do you want to poison?
What do you? - said the Bunny. - I want to be friends with you.
The wolf grinned:
Then - on. Light up.
And he handed the pack to the Bunny.
“It’s too early for me,” said the Bunny. - My mother doesn’t allow me.
“And I allow it,” said the Wolf. - So tell your mom.
What was to be done? The bunny took a cigarette.
The wolf clicked his lighter. He brought the flame to his very face:
Come on, come on. Take a drag!
The bunny inhaled thick acrid smoke. It was as if a bomb had exploded inside him.
He coughed. The cigarette shot out of his mouth like a rocket from a launcher.
The wolf screamed, throwing off her burning debris.
The Bunny no longer tried to make friends with the Wolf. When she sees his stooped figure, legs in hands - and full speed ahead!
The bunny got up from the sofa and went to the balcony. "Can you see the Wolf?"
No, it doesn't seem to be visible. You can go for a walk.
Oh! He forgot to water the flowers! Mom asked.
The bunny returned to the room. I took a watering can from the kitchen. I filled it with water from a special jar “For flowers”.
He went out onto the balcony again.
And how many weeds there are among the flowers!
He placed the watering can on the concrete floor. He returned to the room again. I found my mother's scissors that she used to cut weeds.
And the Bunny did not see that the Wolf had been watching him from behind the bushes for a long time. That he tore the clothesline off the poles. He threw it like a lasso over the television antenna. And climbs up it, onto his balcony. And he whistles another song:
"If... a friend... suddenly appeared..."
Bunny didn't see any of this. He was busy: he was cutting off the insolent weeds.
“What kind of weed is this? Thick as a rope! It doesn’t belong here!”
Bunny - right! And he cut it off.
And it really was a rope.
And the Wolf flew down! Straight into a police wheelchair.
Perhaps he would not have ended up in the carriage. But just at that moment the blind Behemoth was crossing the street.
He went to order glasses. On the ground floor of the large-block building there was a pharmacy, specializing in glasses. And Behemoth had a recipe. According to which, as a pensioner, he was entitled to free glasses at this special pharmacy.
And he walked, rejoicing that soon he would be able to see everything well with his new glasses. Even your small pension.
But now he was without glasses and did not see the motorcycle.
The motorcycle squealed on its brakes, swerved sharply to the side and drove onto the sidewalk. Just where the Wolf fell.
That's why the Wolf landed right in the police wheelchair.
If it weren't for Behemoth, he would never have gotten there.
And that’s why the Wolf shouted with all his might to the whole street:
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
Chapter two
SERGEANT MEDVEDEV
Sergeant Medvedev was happy. The Wolf has finally been caught. The same one. Who ate my grandmother too. And "Little Red Riding Hood". And seven kids. And he was going to eat three unfortunate piglets.
HELLO GUYS!
You've probably seen the movie "WELL, WAIT!"
About the Wolf and the Hare.
In this book you will also meet the Wolf and the Hare.
But not only with them.
Also with the Bunny’s parents - his father is a doctor and his mother is a teacher.
And with his grandmother, a farmer.
And with the deceiver Lisa.
And with a real Gray Wolf from a real fairy tale.
Whose name is Kuzma.
And with Baba Yaga, also real.
And with Behemoth, who became one of the main participants in our history.
And with many other heroes.
You probably guessed it?
Yes! This book is about the BRAND NEW, UNKNOWN ADVENTURES OF THE WOLF AND THE HARE.
Now two Wolves are chasing our Bunny.
And I won’t say how it all ends. Otherwise, you will not be interested in reading the book.
Chapter One
WHY DO NOT WOLVES LIKE HARES?
The bunny lived in an ordinary large-block house.
In the same way as many of his fellow citizens: Deer, Hippos, Rams, Badgers, Bears, Goats. Workers and employees, writers and scientists, businessmen and...
No. Businessmen did not live in such houses. And if they lived, they were not very respectable.
In winter, snowflakes flew into the cracks between the blocks. And you could ski in the rooms. And in the summer the blocks got so hot that it was easy to fry cutlets on them. Press with the back of the pan and fry. The cutlets sizzled and splashed fat in all directions. But they turned out very tasty. Can't compare with any restaurants. It was getting hot in the apartment - no need to go south. Dive into your bath, if there is water, and consider that you are on the sea coast. And if there is no water, it’s also not scary. Can be dialed during rain. The roof leaked so much that on any floor there was knee-deep water.
A large-block house is good for everyone!
But most importantly, he teaches residents to overcome difficulties!
It was in such a house, on the third floor, that Bunny lived.
The Bunny's family was small but hardworking.
His mother, Zaychikha, worked as a kindergarten teacher. And dad, Hare, is a doctor in a children's clinic. Both dad and mom raised and treated other people's children. They did not have enough time for their own son. So the Bunny had to take care of himself. Wash your hands before eating, cook soup from bags, brush your shoes and teeth.
All this taught him to be independent.
And if you remember that Bunny lived in a large-block house, then it becomes clear where he got his dexterity, ingenuity and ability to find a way out of the most difficult situations.
On that ill-fated day when our story began, the Bunny did not think about anything bad. Summer was ahead, the holidays. A trip to visit grandma in the village. The screams of children from their mother’s kindergarten could be heard through the window. It smelled like medicine from my dad's clinic. At such moments you think only about good things. That you are healthy and you don’t need to be treated by your dad. And that you are already an adult. You don't have to go to your mom's kindergarten.
“Summer, ah, summer!.. Red summer, be with me.”
Grandma's village is full of mushrooms. And what fishing!
Eh, it’s good to live in the world!
The only thing that spoiled the mood was the Wolf. From the second entrance. A notorious hooligan. All his life he studied in the third grade, and smoked from the first. As soon as he sees the Bunny, immediately follow him! I had to not yawn and quickly move away.
Then, having caught his breath, Bunny thought:
"What did I do wrong to him?" Or: “Why don’t Wolves like us?”
He asked dad and mom. But they avoided a direct answer.
"When you grow up big, you'll know."
“The main thing, son, is to study well.”
One day the Bunny decided to make friends with the Wolf. I bought his favorite dromedary camel cigarettes.
He held out and said:
Smoke. This is for you.
The wolf took the cigarettes. I lit a cigarette. And then he looked at the Bunny in a bad way:
Do you know that smoking is harmful?
“I know,” said the Bunny.
You know, but you’re slipping it to me. Do you want to poison?
What do you? - said the Bunny. - I want to be friends with you.
The wolf grinned:
Then - on. Light up.
And he handed the pack to the Bunny.
“It’s too early for me,” said the Bunny. - My mother doesn’t allow me.
“And I allow it,” said the Wolf. - So tell your mom.
What was to be done? The bunny took a cigarette.
The wolf clicked his lighter. He brought the flame to his very face:
Come on, come on. Take a drag!
The bunny inhaled thick acrid smoke. It was as if a bomb had exploded inside him.
He coughed. The cigarette shot out of his mouth like a rocket from a launcher.
The wolf screamed, throwing off her burning debris.
The Bunny no longer tried to make friends with the Wolf. When she sees his stooped figure, legs in hands - and full speed ahead!
The bunny got up from the sofa and went to the balcony. "Can you see the Wolf?"
No, it doesn't seem to be visible. You can go for a walk.
Oh! He forgot to water the flowers! Mom asked.
The bunny returned to the room. I took a watering can from the kitchen. I filled it with water from a special jar “For flowers”.
He went out onto the balcony again.
And how many weeds there are among the flowers!
He placed the watering can on the concrete floor. He returned to the room again. I found my mother's scissors that she used to cut weeds.
And the Bunny did not see that the Wolf had been watching him from behind the bushes for a long time. That he tore the clothesline off the poles. He threw it like a lasso over the television antenna. And climbs up it, onto his balcony. And he whistles another song:
"If... a friend... suddenly appeared..."
Bunny didn't see any of this. He was busy: he was cutting off the insolent weeds.
“What kind of weed is this? Thick as a rope! It doesn’t belong here!”
Bunny - right! And he cut it off.
And it really was a rope.
And the Wolf flew down! Straight into a police wheelchair.
Perhaps he would not have ended up in the carriage. But just at that moment the blind Behemoth was crossing the street.
He went to order glasses. On the ground floor of the large-block building there was a pharmacy, specializing in glasses. And Behemoth had a recipe. According to which, as a pensioner, he was entitled to free glasses at this special pharmacy.
And he walked, rejoicing that soon he would be able to see everything well with his new glasses. Even your small pension.
But now he was without glasses and did not see the motorcycle.
The motorcycle squealed on its brakes, swerved sharply to the side and drove onto the sidewalk. Just where the Wolf fell.
That's why the Wolf landed right in the police wheelchair.
If it weren't for Behemoth, he would never have gotten there.
And that’s why the Wolf shouted with all his might to the whole street:
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
Chapter two
SERGEANT MEDVEDEV
Sergeant Medvedev was happy. The Wolf has finally been caught. The same one. Who ate my grandmother too. And "Little Red Riding Hood". And seven kids. And he was going to eat three unfortunate piglets.
To jail!
In vain did the Wolf argue:
I didn’t eat anyone, citizen boss. For meat, I prefer fish. With beer. Vobla, canned herring. And for the little goats... Or the grandmothers?! Who do you take me for?
But Medvedev did not believe the Wolves. He believed only in the rules. And also to Captain Mishkin. But Captain Mishkin was ill. And in the charter it was clearly written: “No matter how much you feed the Wolf, everything looks into the forest.”
In other words, you can’t trust Wolves either in the forest or in the city.
The next day, in the morning, Bunny's dad, a doctor, unfolded the newspaper.
“Finally,” he said, “the Wolf was caught.”
God bless! - Mom was happy. - One less bully.
The newspaper published the following message:
A seasoned criminal has been caught. Nicknamed "Grey". In the interests of the investigation, we do not disclose details. But as we learned: the Wolf, nicknamed “Grey,” attacked his victims unexpectedly. Changed his voice to that of a goat. He put a red cap on his head. We ask the Three Little Pigs and the Seven Little Goats to appear as witnesses. And although there has not been a trial yet, the verdict is known.
And then there’s a photo of the Wolf. Behind bars. In a large cell.
When the bunny saw it, he gasped!
This is not true! This is not his fairy-tale Wolf. He was the one who ate everyone.
Anyone else in Bunny's place would have been happy. The wolf is behind bars. Drink carrot juice and go for a walk!
But this is not how the Bunny was raised.
“We must live honestly,” dad often said.
And my mother added:
“If you see a lie, son, don’t pass by.”
And the Bunny did not pass by. He ran.
But Sergeant Medvedev did not believe him.
We know you. Wolf and Hare - two boots in a pair!
What do boots have to do with it?
Comrade Sergeant, - the Bunny did not let up. - I know him. He's bad. Hooligan. But he didn't do it.
Captain Mishkin will recover and sort it out. Who did it and who didn't. And just in case, leave your address. You're too protective of your friend.
The Bunny walked home in a sad mood. If Captain Mishkin is seriously ill, untruth will prevail. Can this be allowed? No! Never!
The day was approaching evening. The sun dropped behind the roof of a high-rise building. The bunny stepped on his long, long shadow. And immediately it felt cool.
No, summer is still far away.
“I wish I could bring this Sergeant Medvedev a real Wolf. The fabulous one. Bring him and say:
"Here he is - a seasoned criminal. Feel the difference!"
And as soon as the Bunny thought this, he saw a bright, all in lights, shop window:
"VIRTUAL REALITY"
Computers shone behind huge windows that spanned an entire floor. The sensors were flashing. Sharp laser beams hit my eyes. Like in a science fiction movie!
The doors in front of the Bunny opened by themselves. And he went inside.
The inside was even more mysterious than the outside.
Instead of a ceiling there is a black starry sky. A cold, flickering light fell from the sky. No street noise, no sound of voices. Screens, screens. Everywhere you look there are only screens.
What do you want?
A salesman stood nearby. In a black suit. And huge dark glasses. He looked like a magician from a circus.
It's dark and I'm wearing glasses!
He took off his glasses and handed them to Bunny:
Take a look!
The bunny looked through his glasses.
And I saw some castle on a rock. A horseman galloped towards the castle gates. The sun sparkled on the tip of the spear.
The bunny closed his eyes.
“What is that,” the seller smiled. - We have helmets. You put it on and go wherever you want. Virtual reality! At affordable prices. Quite accessible, young man.
Is it possible to get into a fairy tale? - asked the Bunny.
To a fairy tale? Nothing could be simpler.
The seller waved his hands and took out a huge transparent helmet. Like astronauts. Only more.
You put on this helmet. And you are in a fairy tale.
Where should I look? - asked the Bunny.
But nowhere. Sit down in this cozy chair... What fairy tale do you want to go to? Ours? Or to Hans Christian Andersen?
“To ours,” said the Bunny.
“I praise you,” said the seller. - So young, but already a patriot.
He waved his hand again.
This time he had a floppy disk in his hand.
Who do you want to be in a fairy tale? Maybe a frog princess?
Here's more! Jump through the swamps and eat bugs.
But,” said the seller, “then you will become a queen.” You will rule the kingdom.
I wish I could cope with my homework. Not like with the kingdom. Do you know how much they ask?
“I know,” said the seller. - I also studied at school.
He laughed:
Don't be offended, I'm joking. What can I offer you? Don’t you want to be a Bunny, like in life?
No. I don't want to be a bunny. Tired of it.
In vain. Very good people - Hares. So sweet, kind, sympathetic. They don't wish harm to anyone.
But anyone can offend.
Then become a Wolf.
A wolf? - the Bunny was indignant. - This was not enough yet!
What should we do?.. Do you want to be strong and brave? - the seller thought. - Maybe a soldier then?
Is there such a fairy tale? - the Bunny was happy.
The seller pressed the button. The names of fairy tales flashed on the tiny screen.
Here! - said the seller. - Found it! "Ivan Tsarevich is a brave soldier." This fairy tale also contains Baba Yaga and the Gray Wolf.
Real?
You offend me, young man. Everything we have is real.
This was a chance! Catch and bring to the police the very real Gray Wolf. But Baba Yaga... is scary.
Is it impossible without Baba Yaga?
The seller was even offended:
It’s not for us to remake fairy tales. People have been creating them for centuries!
Sorry,” said the Bunny. - I didn't think. You're right. Let everything be as the people created it.
“That’s smart,” the seller nodded. - I liked you right away. The culture and upbringing are felt. Who are your parents?
Dad is a doctor. And my mother is a teacher ancient history. But now she works as a teacher. In kindergarten.
Say hello to them. When you return from a fairy tale.
Necessarily.
The seller put a space helmet on Bunny's head.
Good luck! Have a nice trip!
And everything immediately disappeared...
Chapter Three
HARE - GOOD SOLDIER
As soon as the seller put the helmet on the Bunny’s head, it became dark. Almost like being in bed under the covers. Then the light dawned a little...
And the Bunny saw himself on a hillock, at the edge of the forest.
The river meandered in the distance.
The sun had just dropped below the treetops. Their jagged shadows covered the hillock and buried themselves in the riverbed. Fog floated over the river. It smelled of dampness and autumn leaves. Yes, yes, in the fall. It's spring in the city, but here it's autumn!
The Bunny had high boots on his feet. Behind his shoulders is a gun and a backpack. He felt strong and brave. As befits a soldier... But it was still a little scary.
Hello, soldier! - a nasty voice rang out.
Baba Yaga flew by, almost hitting him with a broom. There was a felt boot on one leg, and a pulled down stocking on the other. The stocking fluttered like an upside-down flag.
Baba Yaga made a circle and landed.
Are you tired, soldier? Spend the night at my place. You'll take a steam bath in the bathhouse. I'll give you some tea.
Baba Yaga smiled with a toothless mouth.
“We know your teas,” thought the Bunny. “We’ve read fairy tales.”
But he said out loud:
Why not take a steam bath? Do you have a Wolf?
Which Wolf? Where is Wolf from? - the grandmother squealed. - There is one... Old, shabby. You can’t even call him a Wolf.
Pensioner, or what? - the Hare grinned.
What? - the grandmother was surprised. - I have never heard such a word.
SONGS-oner,” corrected the Bunny. - Who sings songs.
Not. He doesn’t sing, his song is sung... Well, sit on the broom.
The bunny sat down in front of the grandmother on the broom. She wrapped her bony hand around him. With her other hand she lifted the broom slightly...
And they flew into the air.
It was uncomfortable to sit on the broom. You're about to fall off. If the Bunny had not been a gallant soldier, he would have shouted all around: “Ma-a-ma!”
But he was a soldier. Brave and courageous. And that says it all.
They flew over the river, catching wisps of fog with their feet. We rose a little higher... Suddenly we flew out into the sun.
It immediately became warm, and the red solar ball... No, not a ball, but the edge of a ball, no larger than a watermelon rind, filled the entire sky with a fabulous scrambled egg.
But then it became dark again. The watermelon rind fell over the horizon. The festive colors have faded. But the moon lit up. It was as if someone had turned off the sun and turned on the moon. And now their flight took place in the greenish light.
We flew over the forest. It was hard to see which one. IN moonlight all the trees seemed gray.
Something very large rustled in the air. Bird?.. No. Magic carpet!
A man in a long robe stood on the carpet. Mustachioed, with a saber. Turning around, he gave them a ceremonial bow.
Baba Yaga shouted after him:
Get out of here, get lost! Is the sky not enough? The mulberry flew apart in our fairy tales! I'll kill you! I'll meet you again!
She couldn't calm down for a long time:
Orders have been established. Whoever wants to, flies. Magic carpets, all sorts of Carlsons. Scattered! Foreign evil spirits!
The forest beneath them began to thin out, and the water surface sparkled. Sea-lake! Everything is covered in silver lambs. AND sailing ship in the middle. The sails on the masts are like snow-white pillows.
The guns from the pier are firing, the ship is ordered to land!
This is true. The roar of guns!
This is from the other side.
On the other bank is the royal palace, surrounded by a wall. From above, the palace looks like cream cake. Painted curlicues, turrets, transitions.
Everything sparkles and sings! The sun came out.
Dawn! Fast, like in a fairy tale.
Now it’s not far,” said Baba Yaga.
And they flew very low, along the shore. It smelled like algae. The spray from the waves tingled my face.
Below, an old man with a white beard was pulling a net out of the water.
How's the fish? Getting caught? - Baba Yaga shouted to him.
The old man grabbed a stone from the sand:
Fly away, you damned one!
Can't get caught! Can't get caught! - Baba Yaga laughed. - And your wife is old. And the hut. And he himself is not Ivan Tsarevich.
The bunny felt awkward. He turned to Baba Yaga:
Why are you doing this? To an elderly person...
What is he? I caught a golden fish, but couldn’t manage it. Ugh! The fly is rolling.
The old man shouted something and waved his fists. But they didn't hear.
They jumped over sand dunes, flew over a stunted swamp, and again the forest began to grow below. But already black, alarming.
Huge spreading spruce trees, centuries-old pines. And suddenly - the forest parted, a clearing. Let's go for landing.
The end of the broom rustled across the grass. They ran a few meters...
All. We landed.
“I almost lost my stocking,” the grandmother grumbled. - I darn, darn... And buy new ones - where are the days?
The bunny noticed a hut at the edge of the clearing. On chicken legs. Very similar to huge "Bush legs". Only with claws.
The door swung open with a roar, and the Wolf jumped out onto the porch. Gray back, reddish belly. Evil green eyes.
Bunny's heart sank to his feet.
Wow, “older,” was all he said.
The wolf realized his mistake, crouched and limped:
The bones are old. My lower back cramped. My head is breaking. There is noise in the ears. Oh, I feel bad, I feel bad!
My poor, sick man,” the grandmother stroked him. - It completely fell apart. Well, nothing, Kuzma. I'll give you some weed. You will leave.
“I won’t leave,” Kuzma muttered. - I hear that I won’t leave.
I burst into tears. Better bring some firewood. And cones for the samovar. And you, soldier, settle down. First - tea, then a bathhouse. All the illness will come out of you.
“We know your teas,” thought the Bunny. “We’ve read fairy tales. Once you drink a cup, you won’t need another.”
But he said out loud:
I love tea! More than anything else. More cabbage, carrot juice. More than the stalks themselves.
FAQ? - the grandmother was surprised. - What juice? Carrot?
Birch,” corrected the Bunny. - During the hike it’s hot and dusty. No water, no stream. We can only save ourselves with this juice.
What juice in summer? - the grandmother was surprised. -Are you familiar, dear? Birch sap in spring! And that’s the earliest one.
In the spring! Right. We stock it up for the whole year. In banks. Three-liter. Roll up the lids and drink.
Lids? - Baba Yaga was surprised.
With jugs,” corrected the Hare. - Three-liter jars.
I don't like this soldier. Oh, how I don’t like it! - Kuzma said in a whisper.
Cowardly hurt. There are no such soldiers. And he smells like spirit.
Russian? - asked the grandmother.
Hare. Like from a brown hare.
“You’ve become old, Kuzma,” the grandmother also said in a whisper. - You are confusing the Soldier with the Hare.
Go! Do it!
They went into the hut. There was a huge oven inside. With walls black from soot. Next to the stove is a wooden table. There are dirty, unwashed dishes on the table.
Hey! - Baba Yaga shouted to Kuzma. -Who will wash the dishes?
The wolf obediently jumped into the hut:
Forgot. I'll be there in a jiffy.
He quickly licked the bowls with his tongue:
All! It doesn't get any cleaner.
“Everything needs to be reminded,” the grandmother grumbled. - Every time.
She brushed a huge bone off the table and it flew into the corner where the scraps lay.
Bring some firewood, throw away the bones! - the grandmother shouted.
Why throw them away? - came from outside. - I'll chew some more.
Grandma pretended to sigh:
With your teeth? You'll break the last ones.
She covered the scraps with a dirty towel:
She was a good chick... She should live and live.
“I shouldn’t have chosen this fairy tale,” the Hare regretted. “It would have been better about the Frog Princess. There is no Wolf there, no Baba Yaga. The largest predator is the frog frog.”
Where can I wash? - he asked out loud.
“And there,” said the grandmother and nodded towards the stove. - The fire goes out - we’ll splash some water. Nice bathhouse, oh, nice! In black. Or have you never washed like this, soldier?
Kuzma flew into the hut. His eyes sparkled bloodthirstyly:
Well? Have you already steamed? And that is, I really want to.
“Not to eat, but to drink,” his grandmother corrected him. - Drink tea.
Yeah,” Kuzma said. - I want to drink tea, but I really want to.
While the stove was melting, the grandmother inflated the samovar. The samovar was bouncing on the floor from the excess steam.
“Sit down, dear,” the grandmother invited. - First - tea, and then a bathhouse.
After the bathhouse - Vanka! - joked the Wolf.
The grandmother hit him on the back with a log:
Damned Herod! Is this how guests are treated?
And she quietly poured the grass into one of the cups.
“Datura grass,” the Hare guessed.
And again his heart sank to his feet:
I don't want tea.
How can you not want to? - the grandmother was surprised. - Everything is ready!
She took turns placing cups under the samovar tap:
Enta cup - for you...Enta - for me...Enta for my gray friend.
The bunny noticed that his cup had a crack. Barely noticeable. Under the handle.
And then a saving thought came to him. He saw how a magician once quickly and deftly changed places of cups.
An old trick! - exclaimed the Bunny and quickly swapped the cups. - I put raspberries in one of the cups.
He threw a raspberry into his cup, with a crack.
I cover all the cups with this handkerchief. I change their places under the scarf... Now tell me, dear citizens, which of these cups contains raspberries?!
Baba Yaga and the Wolf blinked their eyes.
The prize will be a gold ruble!
And the Bunny pulled out a sparkling gold coin from the soldier’s pants.
“Eh,” he thought, “our brother was paid well!”
Hurry up! - he shouted. - Don’t think too long!
In entoy! In entoy! - Baba Yaga shouted and slammed the handkerchief on one of the cups.
No - in this! - Wolf pointed to another cup.
The bunny pulled off the scarf. The raspberries, as expected, were in his cup, with a crack. Baba Yaga guessed right.
The bunny handed her a gold ruble, the old woman beamed as brightly as the coin:
I'll buy stockings and make a new broom.
And the cup with the crack now stood in front of the Wolf.
Well, well... Shall we drink some tea? - asked the Hare.
We will, we will, said Baba Yaga.
Let the soldier drink first! - said the Wolf.
Why is it me? - asked the Hare. - Maybe your seagull... that one. Eh, grandma?
What are you doing, honey?! And how could he think such a thing?
She moved the cup with datura grass closer to the Wolf:
Drink, Kuzma!
“It’s hot, it hurts,” said the Wolf.
Drink to whom I tell you!
There was nothing to do, Kuzma sighed and took a sip from his cup.
The Hare and Baba Yaga looked at him intently.
And no matter the seagulls! - Kuzma was delighted. And he took another sip. - Oh, nothing!
He looked cheerfully at the other teapots:
Why don't you drink?
Let's drink, let's drink!
Baba Yaga took the Wolf's cup.
She was sure that the tea in this cup was not poisoned.
And she took a sip too.
Now it's your turn, little soldier. Help yourself!
I? With great pleasure!
The hare was calm. He knew that he was drinking normal, unpoisoned tea.
The Wolf was the first to smell the datura grass. He yawned, showing his toothy mouth to the whole world. His eyes closed. And quietly, without noise, he slid to the floor.
Then Baba Yaga realized what had happened:
Ah, vile soldier! Oh, damn it! Well, I'll tell you...
She rushed out of her seat and opened the chest. I probably wanted to take the life-saving medicinal herb from there... But I didn’t have time. Just as quietly as the Wolf, she sank to the floor.
That’s better,” said the Soldier Hare. - You will know how to drink tea.
He found a bag. With difficulty he pushed the Wolf's head into it. Then he rested his feet on the wolf’s ass and pushed everything else through.
And he wrapped the bag tightly with ropes!
But suddenly everything disappeared. And Baba Yaga and the hut.
The bunny was in the store again.
Well? Did you like it?
And suddenly the seller noticed a bag next to the Bunny.
Wow! - that’s all he said. - This is the first time I’ve seen anything brought from there!
Chapter Four
YOU WILL CHASE TWO WOLVES...
After about half an hour, Zaychik delivered the bag with Kuzma to the police station.
But Sergeant Medvedev again did not believe him.
When Captain Mishkin recovers, he will sort it out. Which one is real? Who is to be judged according to the law, and who is to be judged without any law.
The bunny was horrified:
But it's not fair! You can't do that!
- "To live with wolves is to howl like a wolf." To jail! Let them both sit for now!
So Kuzma ended up behind bars.
And this was Sergeant Medvedev’s biggest mistake. After his entry into law enforcement agencies. To which he could not be allowed within range of a cannon shot.
Two Wolves are a terrible force. It's almost a pack.
At night, the Wolves gnawed through the bars and escaped. They disappeared in an unknown direction. Not known to Sergeant Medvedev. Not even the sick captain Mishkin.
Having run a respectable distance, both Wolves sat down on a bench in the park.
Kuzma is not tired at all. It was as if he hadn’t just been flying at a gallop, pushing off the asphalt with all four paws.
But our Wolf couldn’t catch his breath. He coughed, wheezed, gasped for air.
Kurr-re-vo... Damn it!.. Kha-kha!.. If I catch a hare, I’ll make a load... Kha-kha!!!
“And I’ll catch him,” Kuzma said gloomily, “first I’ll kick his ears, and then I’ll eat him!”
In what sense? - the Wolf didn’t understand.
Live!
What about “horns and legs”? - joked the Wolf. - For jellied meat.
No jellied meats! - Kuzma growled. - Warm! Chubby! Yummy!
And he revealed his fangs, stained with rust from the bars.
“And he will eat it,” thought the Wolf. “This is not me. A city dweller. Everything they have is natural.
You know, Kuzma,” said the Wolf, “while we catch him, it’s as if we ourselves weren’t caught.” We should hide and wait it out. My brother lives nearby.
It’s business,” Kuzma said.
It seemed to our Wolf that a police car was about to catch up with them. Riot Bears will jump out of the car, throw them to the ground, twist them, poke machine gun barrels into their backs: “Gotcha, bandits! Weapons? Drugs?”
The wolf often saw similar scenes on TV. And I was very afraid to find myself in the place of those criminal Wolves.
But everything worked out. The city was sleeping. Police cars turned out to be watering. They did not spare water, which made the greenery that had blossomed the other day smell even stronger.
The Wolf's brother, Vityai, turned out to be of powerful build. Huge muscles flexed under the blue T-shirt. He worked as a loader in a store. I got up at five, but then I had to get up at three.
I don’t approve,” he said. - You have to live by the law. OK. Rest until morning. And then we'll see.
He led them into the next room. I set up a folding bed. He threw pillows and two blankets.
You’re a tough bro,” Kuzma said. - And there is nothing to object to. Very healthy.
Yes. He took after our grandfather.
Who are you? Grandma?
“I’m like my father,” said the Wolf. - He was such a moron, cleaner than me. I only saw him once. In the photo. "Criminal Wanted."
One can only be proud of such a father,” Kuzma said. - If I had a dad like him, I would put this photo in a frame and on the wall.
What about your father? - asked the Wolf.
My? He went abroad. In their fairy tales. To the Brothers Grimm. For easy life chased.
The goat gored him.
Yeah. He didn't know their language. The goat comes. “You are my little goats, guys. Your mommy came and brought milk”... And he speaks all this in German. And my fool... He should run... And he opens the door and in pure Russian: “Hello, mom”... And then I suppose you heard? She gored him.
“I heard,” said the Wolf.
Since then I have these Hares...
Some are Goats, some are Hares! - Wolf supported. - One tribe. They chew grass and cabbage. They go to different schools. In the galleys.
Okay,” Kuzma said. - Let's sort it out! Where do they go? What kind of galoshes?
The wolf put down the cot. He threw a blanket over her.
FAQ? - Kuzma was surprised. - What a lordship. Maybe brush your teeth too?
He opened the balcony door and lay down on the cold concrete floor:
I love fresh air.
And I,” said the Wolf. - Spring... I love spring.
Who doesn't love her? “It’s the hunt,” Kuzma said. - All of them have small children. Delicious!
And again the Wolf admired: “How simple everything is with Kuzma! It’s not like we are children of tsa-vyalization. And what’s her name?”
But he thought this as he was already falling asleep.
A few hours later Vityai woke them up:
Let's take a sip of tea and off we go!
We sipped tea from aluminum mugs. Very strong brew. Taste with a loaf of boiled sausage. Vityai divided the loaf into three parts. Each got about thirty centimeters.
A furniture van was waiting for them at the entrance. And two young bulls. Healthy, like brother Vityai.
Volk and Kuzma completed the first flight. They carried furniture along with everyone else. True, Kuzma was of little use. Neither to support the closet, nor to help with the sofa.
Eventually, he was assigned to guard the furniture. He was on duty like a simple dog. But at the sight of such a dog, everyone crossed to the other side of the street.
One Cow raised a cry:
Ugliness! Such a dog, and without a muzzle! Where are the police looking?!
Kuzma wanted to tell her where she was looking, but Vityai did not allow it. I was not too lazy to stop by the store and buy a collar with spikes for Kuzma. And a muzzle.
Get used to city life, Kuzma!
In a collar and muzzle, Kuzma looked like a huge German shepherd. Only the eyes burned with fierce anger from resentment.
After the third voyage, our Wolf finally died. I couldn't straighten my back. He's about to land on all fours. Like Kuzma.
Nothing! - Vityai clapped him on the shoulder. - The first day is the most difficult. It will be easier from here on out.
But things didn't get any easier.
The fifth flight was decisive.
They were dragging a heavy sofa. To the ninth floor. No elevator. Kuzma also had to put his hump on the line. Crawling on your belly down dirty steps.
Vityai, feeling sorry for them, said:
Take a little rest.
And he went into the kitchen. Deal with the owner, sign receipts.
The wolf immediately recognized the owner. It was the same Behemoth. Because of which he ended up in the police. In trampled shoes, with patches on the sweater.
But Behemoth did not recognize him. He still didn't have his glasses. He just ordered them. In a special pharmacy. By points.
“I’ve had enough,” Kuzma said. - Easier than three fuck the chicks!
“And I’ve had enough,” said the Wolf. - I’ve never worked so much in my life.
And then they both noticed the clock. Pocket. On the nightstand. Apparently, Behemoth forgot them. Or didn't notice.
I wonder,” said the Wolf, “what time is it?” Don't you know, Kuzma?
Where should I go?
ABOUT! It's twelve already! - said the Wolf and put the watch in his pocket: - It’s time for lunch!
And both fell head over heels down the stairs.
Where are you going? - Bull, who alone was dragging up a heavy refrigerator, was surprised.
Buy some water!
There is tea in a thermos. There is no point in wasting money!
But they never drank the tea from the thermos.
None of the loader crew saw them again.
Chapter Five
IT'S ALL THE HARRIES' BLAME!
The wolf and Kuzma settled in the basement. Not far from the house where the Hare lived.
Previously, there was a boiler room here; even three cast-iron boilers with an ancient inscription: “Universal” have been preserved. And in the boilers... There was so much! Gum wrappers, tin cans. A striped American flag hung from rusty pipes.
All day Kuzma and Wolf lay on dirty mattresses. We waited for it to get dark. Kuzma did not give up hope of meeting the Hare. He was on duty under the windows. I was waiting for him in a dark alley. But Bunny, it seems, was warned. If he left the house, it was with his bespectacled mom or dad.
One day Kuzma almost got caught himself.
That's how it was.
Kuzma was waiting for the Bunny in the courtyard of his house. Late in the evening. With a bouquet of flowers. At the trash container. Lying down. He had been waiting for him for several hours. But it never came. Fell asleep at the combat post. And he woke up already in a car van. No windows, no doors. Next to a skinny, shabby dog. The dog moaned all the time.
Where are we? - asked Kuzma.
But the dog either couldn’t or didn’t want to talk.
He crawled away in fear to another corner.
The van bounced over the bumps, Kuzma was thrown from side to side.
In one of the walls he discovered a barred window. I looked at it and was stunned. They rushed at a terrible speed, and there were no horses or any other driving force ahead.
Kuzma pounded into the front wall.
Hey! Open up!
The van stopped. Kuzma heard surprised voices:
Who could be yelling there? Dogs?
You yourself are dogs! - Kuzma shouted.
The sounds of a lock being opened were heard. The door swung open.
Who's here?!
Who, who? Gray Wolf! That's who! - Kuzma barked.
And, jumping over the heads of the “dog walkers,” he took to his heels.
After this incident, he became even more angry. I hated both the Bunny and this whole city.
“They walk on their hind legs. They ride on carts with a motor. Smoke! Like after the Serpent Gorynych.”
The wolf did not argue with his comrade. He understood how hard it was for Kuzma. Pretend to be a dog all the time and even wear a muzzle.
Kuzma was especially out of sorts today. They haven't eaten anything since morning. The last fruit gum was divided in half and swallowed at six o'clock in the morning. That's all breakfast.
What time do you think it is? - asked the Wolf.
He asked simply to distract Kuzma from his gloomy thoughts. And then he answered himself:
And I think it's five. I can see this from the sun.
He was lying. It was completely impossible to see the sun in their basement. Through the small window under the ceiling one could only see the feet of passers-by.
You can see it by the sun, but I can see it by the belly. I really want to eat,” Kuzma said.
And I want to,” said the Wolf. - Now I'd like some sausages. Doctoral. And even better than veal.
And even better,” said Kuzma, “a calf.” Without any sausage.
The most delicious part is the back part,” said the Wolf. - For a barbecue.
I would have eaten it anyway. Without any barbecue.
No,” Kuzma joked. - Boiled.
And both fell silent.
What are you thinking about? - asked the Wolf.
I think if there is no calf, the meat of the Hares is no worse. What are you talking about?
And I think... Well, why is it arranged this way? Schools, academies, textbooks - everything for the Hares. Here you are, for example, Kuzma. Are you on TV? No! And on the radio? Not again. And they show Zaitsev. Why?
Because they don’t eat them at your place,” Kuzma said gloomily. - So they multiplied. Like rabbits. You need to eat hares. They should be running, not sitting in t-shirts.
You can’t eat them,” said the Wolf. - Here, you know... For such things.
Then keep quiet. You'll see us soon. The hares will start to eat you yourself.
What you? Peck your tongue!
Let's start, let's start! Remember my words. Either they us, or we them. They will form flocks and start chasing us.
It turns out there is no way out? - The Wolf was horrified.
There is only one way out.
You need to eat them! For breakfast, lunch and dinner. That's the whole way out!
After the word “eat,” both fell silent. Everyone thought about food again.
Listen,” said the Wolf. - There is a plan!
What's the other plan?
Sell watches. Why do we need them?
They took out the watch they stole from Behemoth. We examined them carefully.
The hours were so-so. Not gold, not silver. Besides, they haven't walked yet. There was some kind of inscription on the back cover.
De... re... Dore... Dor... Again - "o"... Doro... What letter is this? Half a "pe"?... It seems like a "ge"!
“Well, you’re literate,” said Kuzma.
You will become literate here. When they drive you out of every class. Dogs! From every school.
I really wanted to eat. Very. It was easier for Kuzma. The night before, he caught a pigeon. And he devoured it. In total, entirely. Only feathers flew. And the Wolf had to pierce another hole in the belt.
The clock doesn’t go - that’s nonsense,” said the Wolf. - Did you see the inscription? Let's say that this watch is an antique one. That my grandfather still wore them. Before the revolution. Now everything that was before the revolution is terribly valuable.
And the Wolf outlined the plan. Sell your watch on the stolen goods market. We just have to wait for darkness.
Chapter Six
MARKET FOR STOLEN ITEMS
The market for stolen goods was located on the outskirts of the city. In the park. At the boarded-up cinema.
There was only one light on in the entire park.
Strange personalities approached him. Some are to take a better look at the product. Others - check the money. Aren't they fake?
Lights flashed - someone was lighting a cigarette. And then you could see someone’s broken nose, scar or black eye.
Who needs Volga wheels? With seats, windows, radio, engine, body, headlights and license plates?
I will buy a school certificate. But with only A's!
I drove a piano on wheels. He was transported on a Zaporozhets trailer.
And here is someone's marble head. On the trunk of a motorcycle. Either Pushkin or Lermontov. Either modern writer. Can't see in the dark.
The wolf and Kuzma settled down in a nook, right next to the fence.
Antique silver watch. A gift from a beloved grandfather to his own nephew. Nineteenth century!
Nobody was interested in their product.
The watch is antique, gold. A gift from my great-great-grandfather. Seventeenth century!
No result.
The watch is antique. Diamond. A gift from my great-great-great-grandfather. Fifteenth century... BC!
And then a wide shadow covered them.
Can I look at your watch?
The head of Hippopotamus stood out against the background of the starry sky. The same one. Low-blind. Whose watch they stole.
The wolf, confused, handed him the watch.
Are they really diamonds? - asked Behemoth.
Is it true. The numbers are diamond and the hands are gold.
It’s a pity,” said Behemoth. - Mine were very simple.
Lost,” the Wolf sympathized.
No, said Behemoth. - It was stolen.
Ah, scum! - shouted the Wolf. - What scum!
The hippopotamus continued to look at the clock.
Very, very similar to mine. Only mine were simple, very simple. No diamonds, no gold.
I would like these thieves!!! - the Wolf shouted again. - Without trial or investigation!!!
Kuzma pulled him by the trouser leg. The wolf himself understood that it was time to reel in the fishing rods.
And Behemoth kept looking at his watch in the dark:
Mine had an inscription on the back.
He pulled out his glasses from his pocket:
Oh, sorry, the glasses are not mine.
"To-ro-go-mu and love... be-hemotics... From the grandfather of Behemoth..."
Wow, just like mine!
You know what? - said the Wolf. - Take the watch for free. We don't need someone else's!
The hippopotamus finally understood everything. He grabbed the Wolf by the collar, lifted him off the ground and shouted to the whole park:
Oh you thief!
They hissed at him from all sides:
Hush, dad. Everyone here is like that.
But it was difficult to calm down “father”:
You are a thief! Thief. My watch was stolen. Ah, thief!
The wolf hung between heaven and earth.
Let me go, dad. Let me go. I won't do it anymore. I swear by my grandfather. Yours and mine.
Kuzma tried to come to his friend’s aid. He bared his teeth and growled. He grabbed his trouser leg.
But Hippopotamus sent him to the far end of the park with one kick.
And after him, a moment later, the Wolf flew.
To the same far end of the park.
Only Kuzma rose from the puddle, just wanted to stand on all four limbs...
How the Wolf fell on top of him.
And then they screamed together into the darkness of the night. For this whole damn park:
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!!!
Chapter Seven
IT'S BETTER TO BE RICH AND HEALTHY!
Dirty, wet Wolf and Kuzma left the park. I really wanted to eat. But apparently their fate is this: to spend the night hungry today.
The huge shiny car squealed on its brakes. Streams of water from under the wheels doused them from head to toe.
Kuzma roared with anger.
But such a huge Lev jumped out of the car that there was no point in sorting things out.
He was all in black leather. And he also has a crew cut, like all the lions in this city.
Lev leaned over and scratched Kuzma behind the ear:
How much is the dog?
What kind of dog? - the Wolf didn’t understand.
This one, bro. In a collar.
Not for sale! - Wolf snapped rudely.
Sell it, bro. I won't offend you.
I have a house. Robbed twice... And with such a dog...
And he scratched Kuzma behind the ear again.
Said no! - the Wolf snapped again.
I'll give you a thousand. Green.
At least two! Do you think you can buy everything?
The Wolf hated these "new Lions". Everything is permitted to them. They roll out on brand new machines. They pour water from under the wheels... No! It won't be your way today!
But then Kuzma stood up on his hind legs and whispered in his ear:
Sell! I'll still run away. And we'll split the money. Understood?
The “New Lion” was delighted to see Kuzma in all his mighty height.
I give you one and a half!.. So be it - two!
Okay,” said the Wolf. - I like you. Take it.
Thanks bro.
Lev reached into his pocket. He pulled out his wallet.
Here. Two thousand. As agreed.
The wolf hid the money in his pocket.
He handed Lev a leash:
Wear it for your health!
What should I feed him? - Lev asked.
Kashami,” said the Wolf. - Manna. Or oatmeal. And more vegetables. Onions, garlic. Carrots, cabbage.
Great! I have two hectares of vegetables!
And he dragged Kuzma into the car.
The wolf approached the lantern. I counted the money.
Everything is exactly like in a pharmacy. The Wolf has never had so much money.
“And what is this Hare to me?” thought the Wolf. “All my life - Hare and Hare... Is there nothing in the world except the Hare?.. With such and such money. The Dog is with him, with this Hare!”
And the Wolf quickly walked down the street.
“First of all, I’ll buy a suit. The most expensive one. Then... And then it will come later!”
He stopped a car passing by.
To the store! The most expensive!
In about ten to fifteen minutes the car rushed him to the city center.
The wolf entered a new, sparkling night store.
There he bought a crimson jacket. Very expensive. Bright, egg-yolk colored trousers. Very expensive. A bow tie, a cigar, French perfume, a hat - everything is very, very expensive!
Then he changed his clothes, right there in a special booth. Left old things to sellers:
Give to the poor. All kinds of badgers, raccoons. Who is poking around in the ground?
And with the gait of a very rich gentleman he left the store.
“Now,” the Wolf decided, “we need to refresh ourselves!”
There was a restaurant across the street. Very expensive. No brainer. A black man was on duty at the entrance - Giraffe.
When he opened the door to the restaurant for Wolf and they saw him there, they rushed to him as if they were their own son who had just returned from the army.
The director himself ran out of his office.
Americano? Italiano?!
Rusano! - the Wolf answered proudly.
He was seated at the most comfortable table. In the corner, under a palm tree. Coconuts grew on the palm tree. But these were not real nuts. The lights glowed inside.
“If only they don’t fall on your head,” thought the Wolf. “Then it will be... in nuts!”
What do you want? - asked the waiter, bending almost double over him.
I wish you some hare! - said the Wolf.
There are no hares. Do you want a rabbit? In sauce "a la champignon"?
Want! - said the Wolf. - But the most expensive! And I also want beer.
The most expensive! Ten mugs. And vobla. The most expensive one.
There are no vobla. Do you want sturgeon? In sauce "a la fish de sprat"?
Is she expensive?
Then I want it. And more cigarettes!
The most expensive? - asked the waiter.
Yes. The most!
A few minutes later another table on wheels was rolled up to his table. And instead of one waiter, he was served by three. One was pouring beer. Another was moving food from plate to plate. The third gave me a light. I stood there like a statue and waited for the Wolf to take a cigarette. Immediately he gets a twinkle. And as soon as the ashes were shaken off, the ashtray was fresh!
“Oh, it’s good to be rich!” thought the Wolf. “Rich and healthy. So that you have enough strength to eat everything you ordered.”
He was deep in thought.
“If I were rich... I would eat here every day. In the morning, and in the afternoon, and in the evening... And I would take some with me. What if I want it at night.”
It's time to pay up. The waiter presented the bill. On a silver plate. Dazzling white leaf.
“Nothing is written here,” said the Wolf.
And you turn over the leaf.
The wolf turned the leaf over and gasped. The bill was such that there was barely enough to pay. The wolf gave everything he had.
Keep the change! - he said graciously, although he was not entitled to change.
The waiter bowed.
While he was bowing, the Wolf quietly hid the silver plate in his pocket.
And he proudly walked towards the exit.
But then another waiter stopped him:
Some dog is asking you. The speaker... Very, very big. She says she’s your good friend.
The wolf immediately realized what kind of dog it was.
No, I'm not familiar! - he shouted. - Don’t let me in... Do you have a way out? Spare?
But the emergency exit did not save the Wolf. As soon as he jumped out, Kuzma blocked his way:
Hello, brother!
Kuzma stood up on his hind legs. A piece of a broken chain hung from his neck.
I’m risking my life here... And my faithful comrade is skipping community days in restaurants.
What are you doing, Kuzma? What you?
Where is my share, brother?
The wolf pulled out the last measly coins from one pocket. And from the other - a silver plate. He put the coins on a plate and handed them to Kuzma.
Kuzma hit the plate from underneath. The coins flew up like a fountain.
If you don’t return my share, you won’t live in this world. I give you three days! And not an ounce more!
Chapter Eight
EVERYTHING ON THE FLOOR! THIS IS A ROBBERY!
Kuzma is not to be trifled with. The Wolf understood this well. It's a piece of cake for him to bite a man to pieces. And who is this man... Maybe he’s the same as you, Wolf - it doesn’t matter.
Three days is not a long time. Where can I get the money? You can't earn much in three days honestly.
The Wolf walked around the basement, thinking.
And finally I came up with:
WE NEED TO ROBB THE BANK!
That's it smart people do. When money is needed. I saw it myself in the movies.
Kuzma supported the idea. But he refused to help: “You are guilty before me, you are robbing. And I’ve had enough.”
And he twirled the piece of chain.
“I took everything into account,” the Wolf convinced him. - There is no risk. Zero!
So much the better,” Kuzma said. - So you can handle it alone.
But two are more fun.
No... I'd rather be a little bored.
At least listen to my plan.
Did you see the bank? Across the road. The floors are marble. The chandeliers sparkle. And there are no people... Taking him is a piece of cake.
How?! - Kuzma asked.
I’m telling you... I come in with a huge bag. There are newspapers in the bag. Ordinary old newspapers.
So that the bag is not empty. They don’t go to banks with an empty bag.
I answer:
“I have currency in my bag.”
He immediately begins to bow. Low - low. He had never seen so much currency in his life.
I grab the baton - and bam on top of him, on the horns!
He's off the hook! I take his revolver and fire into the air.
"Robbery! Everyone - on the floor!" Well, just like in the movies...
"Move it baby!!"
She is in tears:
“Don’t kill me! Otherwise I’ll be fired.”
It’s business,” Kuzma said. - Good plan!
But he still refused to participate.
And the Wolf had to carry out his plan alone.
At first everything went well. Exactly according to plan.
The wolf found the bag. And I found newspapers. And he filled the bag with newspapers. And I found a club. I tore the leg off the chair in the trash heap.
Then, for the sake of prestige, he put on a crimson jacket, bow tie, and egg yolk-colored trousers. He put on some French perfume, put a cigar in his mouth, and hid the chair leg under his arm. He shouldered a huge sack.
And he went to rob a bank.
There were suddenly a lot of people in the bank premises. They gave me a pension.
No one paid attention to the Wolf.
The security guard - Goat - was reading a newspaper far away in the corner.
The wolf tried to squeeze through to him. But they pulled him by the jacket:
Where are you going? There's a line here.
The old man - Ram looked at the Wolf from bottom to top with teary eyes.
Give me the currency. Just for a minute.
Wow, just a minute,” muttered the old lady, “Cow.” - Look how much you have!
No shame, no conscience! - the fat, shortness of breath Pig was indignant.
Get to the end! - Baran said decisively. - Rogue!
Am I a crook?! - the Wolf was offended.
You! You! - Baran confirmed.
“I’m not a swindler,” said the Wolf.
Where does the currency come from?
The wolf started to get excited:
Where did you see the currency?
Yes, that's it! - Baran did not let up. - A whole bag. He stole, he stole! And yet - he jumps in line!
Did I steal this? Did I steal?!
You, you! Rogue!
The wolf untied the bag, raised it high above his head and poured all its contents onto the head of the hated Ram. Old newspapers, apple cores, potato peels, egg cartons - everything I picked up in the trash.
Egg yolks spread across Baran’s face like yellow tears.
Citizens! - Baran yelled. - What is this?! Pensioners are being beaten!
He rushed at the Wolf with his fists. The wolf wanted to hit him with a club. But he couldn’t pull it out from under his arm. The queue squeezed him from all sides.
It would be bad for the wolf. If it weren't for the guard - Goat. Realizing that there was trouble, Kozol grabbed a pistol from his holster:
Citizens! Disperse immediately!
And he shot into the air.
The wolf took advantage of the confusion, broke out of the encirclement and ran out into the street.
But the line rushed after him.
The old man Ram ran the fastest.
The pig with unexpected agility ran across the Wolf's road and tried to knock him down.
The cow gave in from behind with its horns.
And the one-humped Camel, almost the same as on his most favorite cigarettes, spat after him...
And he got it, you scoundrel!
The wolf would probably have run away. He probably would have run away.
But another pensioner, Behemoth, intervened in the events.
He had just gotten off the bus and was standing in the middle of the sidewalk, remembering where to go to get his pension. Right or left?
Finally he stepped to the right.
And he blocked the Wolf’s way.
The Wolf flew at him... And then the pensioners flew at the Wolf.
They knocked him down and began hitting him with umbrellas, briefcases, bags...
But everything in this world, sooner or later, ends.
The ardor of pensioners gradually faded. And everyone began to disperse.
The wolf stood up from the sidewalk and shook himself off. He looked after Behemoth and yelled across the street:
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
Chapter Nine
GIVE IT TO THE POOR CASMONAUT!
Kuzma looked at the Wolf even with some sympathy.
You look like something out of a fairy tale. Everything is the same. "The Wolf and the Seven Little Goats."
What does this have to do with a fairy tale? I didn’t have a goat, but a Goat. And there were not seven kids, but a hundred. And all are pensioners.
No, brother. There was only one goat there. It's you. You shouldn't rob banks, but beg for alms.
Kuzma! - the Wolf was happy. - And this is an idea! If it's a pity? A?
Wolf - and for pity? - Kuzma frowned.
- "What", "what" - nothing! You have a day left. Understood?
And yet... In the trash heap, deep in the yard, they found an old baby stroller. On three wheels. The front wall of the stroller was broken. So that the baby Wolf can sit in it. And instead of the fourth wheel, they attached a frying pan that had been thrown into the trash. The handle of the frying pan had to be broken off so that it would not interfere with movement.
The result is a first-class wheelchair.
The role of the disabled person was to be played by the Wolf.
And Kuzma was assigned the role of a guide dog.
Kuzma himself tied his leash to the front of the stroller.
And off they went!
But before we went, we had to decide which disabled person the Wolf should portray.
War hero?
The Wolf's appearance is not heroic.
He doesn't look much like a hero of labor either.
Finally we settled on the space version.
The wolf scribbled a sign: "GIVE A FULL OF PLOT TO THE SPACE VITIRAN TO THE ROCKET TESTER!"
The Wolf hung the poster on his chest.
And they drove through the city streets.
Kuzma was dragging a stroller, and the Wolf was pretending to be a “space warrior,” looking at the sky as if he had just fallen from the moon.
Passers-by gawked at them, but did not give them “freebies”.
And one Seal said:
Let them FALL in space!
“We decided wrong,” said the Wolf when they returned to the basement. - There is no money for space now. I heard it myself on the radio. Business is in fashion now. It should have been written: “Give it to the poor banker!”
“You look,” said Kuzma, “not like a banker.” You look more like a bandit. From the high road.
You look like yourself!
Yes, it looks like it,” Kuzma said. - And I’m proud of it. Bandits are the nicest people.
Let's write it like that then.
"FALL FOR THE POOR BANDIT!"
That's what they wrote. And the stroller was placed in a dark gateway.
And it went! They began to serve. Every passerby tried to quickly get away.
Soon the Wolf's chic hat was filled with money. Not very large, really. Large amounts of money are not carried around doorways.
And suddenly they saw the Bunny. But the Bunny didn’t see them.
He just entered the gateway from the street. His eyes were not accustomed to the darkness. And when they got used to it, it was too late.
“Great, soldier,” said Kuzma. - Do you recognize it?
The bunny backed away - now there was a stroller between them.
Wait, Ivan the Soldier! What's your hurry?
The bunny noticed that Kuzma's leash was wrapped around the stroller and started running. Kuzma is behind him.
The stroller spun around its own axis.
Passers-by looked with their mouths open at the strange pursuit. Bunny ran ahead. Behind him is a very large dog. And behind the dog, tied by a leash, a baby stroller rolled with a roar.
In the stroller sat a disabled Wolf with a poster on his chest: “FALL TO THE POOR BANDIT!”
It would be bad for the bunny. The street went downhill, and the “poor bandits” quickly caught up with him. Their stroller quickly picked up speed, pushing Kuzma from behind.
But at this time Behemoth came out of the pharmacy. He was very upset. The glasses didn't fit him again. He ordered glasses for myopia, but they gave him glasses for farsightedness. And he couldn’t see anything at all with these glasses on.
The hippopotamus stepped onto the footpath to cross the street.
And he got caught on Kuzma’s leash. The leash tightened like a string - Kuzma almost suffocated on his collar. The stroller overturned and the Wolf fell out of it.
And together they promised after Behemoth:
"WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!"
Chapter Ten
CHEATING FOX
Instead of one disabled person there were now two.
Kuzma had pain in his left leg and right ear.
Wolf's left ear hurt. And my leg didn’t hurt at all. But his right eye was blackened.
From two disabled wolves, one healthy wolf could be collected. If desired. But it's just a joke. But our friends had no time for jokes. And it was becoming dangerous to be in the basement. The police are about to arrive.
Or maybe, well, - said the Wolf, - This little bunny? Summer is coming. Let's go to the sea. There are gold watches and handbags. They lie on the beach, sunbathe. They are waiting for us. Let's start the hunting season. A?
Well, you see, Kuzma. If something is bad somewhere. Or the owners look bad. For something that lies somewhere bad.
So, you need to take it! To look better! - The Wolf couldn’t stand it.
No! This is not a wolf's business! Until I catch the Bunny, there is no peace for my heart. If I catch you, I'll bite you to death. I swear by my dad. Those who died abroad.
“You are very angry, Kuzma,” said the Wolf. - Even too much. Not an ounce of kindness in you. Beating up is a thing. Until you lose your pulse! I understand that.
“Oh, you,” said Kuzma. - The tribe is new, unfamiliar. And who were you born into?
The wolf felt ashamed:
Just kidding, Kuzma. I'm always with you. To the grave. Hare. Death to the Hares!
Look! - Kuzma said sternly. -Your right eye is black. No matter what happens to the left FAQ.
The rain began to patter on the sidewalk. The basement became damp and uncomfortable. Streams of water foamed in the narrow window, directly above their heads. Separate streams broke into the basement and gurgled along the walls.
All this did not strengthen the strength of the spirit. And without that they are not very strong.
Passers-by at the window were running from the downpour. Only their shoes and boots were visible. And legs. But not above the knees.
Fox! - the Wolf suddenly shouted. - I recognized it from the tights. Nobody wears clothes like her. In a red flower.
And what? - asked Kuzma. - Well, Lisa. What, I didn’t see the foxes?
There is no one like her. Her head is an academy! That's who will draw us a plan.
The fox really was as smart as the entire academy. If only this mind was directed towards peaceful goals.
But Lisa took a different path. To cheat, to deceive. Promise and then run away... The world has never seen a greater master! And look at her - she is a beauty. The eyes are honest and kind. At least play a princess in a movie.
What will I get from this? - Lisa asked immediately.
Whatever your heart desires! - said the Wolf.
“My darling has a lot of things,” Lisa smiled. - A new car is good. Gold rings. Creams, perfumes. Kitchen furniture.
How about staying alive? Would you like it? - asked Kuzma.
How strict,” Lisa was offended.
That’s what we have,” said the Wolf. - I grew up without a father, without a mother.
Orphanage, or what? - asked Lisa.
“Sort of,” said the Wolf. - His grandmother raised him.
What other grandma?
Baba Yaga. Have you heard?
It's okay for me to powder my brains! "Baba Yaga raised him"! And I am Koschey the Immortal.
You know what, beauty? - Kuzma said. - I have no time to persuade you. And I saw your Koshchei, just like you. He sat opposite me. He was shaking, sweating, asking to be saved from death.
He's immortal.
For the time being, for the time being. So far no one has found the needle associated with his death. And the needle is in the egg. And the egg is in the duck. And Tsarevich Ivan shot the duck. So it turns out: “Help me out, Kuzma! Help me out, dear one. Bring me an egg. Take half the kingdom. Any half! If you want the right one, you want the left one.”
But Lisa still didn’t believe it:
OK then. How did you get here?
Hare! To give him... Datura grass to drink. And to your city, damn it.
Oh yes Zayai! - Lisa laughed.
But, seeing Kuzma’s eyes, she immediately stopped short:
Okay... I'll help. I don't need half a kingdom. But a piece... Tiny, tiny.
She thought about it.
We need to lure him out of the house. Or better yet, from the city. It's hard in the city. There are police all around. To the village it would be. To grandma. Like in the fairy tale about "Little Red Riding Hood". Have you read it?
“We read, we read,” said the Wolf. - They just didn’t finish reading it. Our literacy rate... Not very good.
“It’s not scary,” said Lisa. - You don't need a diploma if you have a head!
That’s right,” said the Wolf. - Certificate for those who wear glasses. And without glasses I can see where things are bad.
“Let’s not get distracted,” said Lisa. - We talked about grandma. Does he have a grandmother?
Eat! - the Wolf was happy. - I came in winter. A village is a village. It smelled so much like manure that the flies woke up.
Great! Where does she live?
How do I know? I don't correspond with her.
No problem. Let's find out!
The fox wiggled her short skirt and disappeared.
She was gone for an hour or two. Finally arrived. Cheerful, happy.
What would you do without me? I found out! I found out everything. I'm calling your Bunny from a pay phone.
“Forest,” suggests Bunny.
“Yeah, from there... Along this iron road... Well, what’s it called?”
"On Rizhskaya".
“Just about... along Rizhskaya. Your grandmother got sick... From this street...”
"Coniferous".
“Yeah... So get ready, granddaughter, get ready, dear. Hurry up. If you want to be in time. Say goodbye to grandma. And don’t forget the gifts. Butter, herrings...”
“Beer,” suggested the Wolf.
I didn't ask for beer. I don't like him.
What a fool! What could be better than beer? Cold, with a weasel.
Hare! - Kuzma said. - The hare might be better. Or have you forgotten, dear ones, what we’re talking about?
Sorry, Kuzma,” said Lisa. - Don't forget. So... I'm telling him that this is not true. And suddenly... he starts crying... My little bunny. I swear. I felt so sorry for him!
“If I cried, I believed,” Kuzma said. - He cried - it means he’s ours!
He’s kind to us,” said the Wolf. - Our favorite bunny.
“I love kind people,” said Kuzma. - It's worse with the unkind. They cling to their lives. They regret giving it away.
You're right, Kuzma. - said the Wolf. - They'll strangle themselves for a penny!
All! - Kuzma cut off. - We're getting ready.
He approached the puddle. Drank from it. He wiped the drops off his muzzle.
Take a sharper knife. Bag, ropes... Did you forget anything?
The wolf put everything that Kuzma called into a school backpack, which was found right there in the basement.
“Well, I’ll go,” said Lisa. - If you come back, let me know. No fluff to you, my dears, no feather!
Where did it “go”, beauty? - asked Kuzma. - Or don’t you like your plan?
Like. I really like it. But the kids are small. One is getting married tomorrow, dumbass. The other one doesn’t want to join the army. You can't save enough money! And I’m all alone, poor mother.
“Don’t talk us down,” Kuzma said. - You will come with us!
I'm not going anywhere! - Lisa got angry. - Me too... Boss!
What?! - Kuzma grinned. - Won't you f-fuck?!
He stood on his hind legs and placed his front legs on her snow-white blouse.
Won't you f-fuck?!
The fox pushed his paws off his shoulders. There were dirty marks on the blouse.
Ew, fool! Is this how girls are treated? Well, and manners! Where were you brought up?
At the school of noble maidens,” the Wolf laughed. - At Baba Yaga's!
Will you go or not? - Kuzma asked again.
I’ll go, I’ll go,” said the Fox. - I can’t leave such handsome men.
Great! - the Wolf was happy.
But with one condition. You, Kuzma, will wear trousers and a jacket.
What else? What lordship! Maybe I should also attach a tie? What's his name, "grandmother"?
A butterfly,” suggested the Wolf.
And what? And a bow tie wouldn’t hurt,” said Lisa. - And it’s time to stand on your hind legs. We won't get far like this.
I can't do it on your back ones.
You can. Take the stick. You will rely on her. Like a kind old grandfather.
“She’s right,” said the Wolf. - And so everyone is staring at us.
Kuzma was dressed in trousers and a jacket. They gave me a stick for cleaning the sewer. With rubber tip. And Kuzma, bent low, leaning on a stick, like a kind old grandfather, with the “kind” Wolf and the “kind, kind” Fox, headed towards the exit from the basement.
Chapter Eleven
LESNAYA VILLAGE, KHVOYNAYA STREET
Cheerful landscapes flashed outside the train window. Tender greenery, dark fields after winter, colorful cars at the crossings.
Here is a helicopter flying in the blue sky.
Kuzma never ceased to be amazed at how his homeland had changed:
There was nothing - and there you go! Everything rolls and flies on its own. No horses, no flying carpets.
Lisa looked at him with a smile:
Is there anything to be happy about? Dirt, cockroaches. Abroad - yes! You can live there.
“I haven’t been abroad,” Kuzma said. - Enough daddy, you fool. I like my land. Rivers, lakes. And the forests are like that - they will never catch them!
And I love my homeland,” said the Wolf. - If you have a head, you can not work all your life.
It’s good to have a head,” said the Fox, “when that head is beautiful.” Eyes sparkle, cheeks glow. Eh! Where are my seventeen years?
- “Where, where”! In prison! - joked the Wolf.
You're lying! - Lisa was offended. “They didn’t give me more than fifteen days.”
So, chatting pleasantly, the friends drove up to the Lesnaya platform.
A wooden platform stood in the middle of the railroad tracks. The left led to the city, the right - back. The boards on the platform were blackened by time and bicycle tires.
Where to go? - asked the Wolf.
Now we’ll find out,” said Lisa.
She approached the young, handsome Fawn. The little deer was going to the city. He was wearing a clean city suit. In his hands is a briefcase and a bouquet of flowers.
“Hello,” Lisa smiled. - Khvoynaya Street... Can you tell me?
She smiled and twirled her tail.
The little deer was even embarrassed.
Who do you need? I'm from this street myself. Coniferous.
Oh, how good! - Lisa was happy. - We really need Zaitseva. Granny. Do you know this one?
Who doesn’t know Zaitsev? "Granny"! This granny is not old yet. Follow that path up. Through the woods. Past the lake. And then - along the asphalt road. And you will come. To your granny.
The little deer rejoiced at his jokes. He would have seen it off himself, but his bride was waiting for him in the city. Black-eyed beauty Chick.
The friends went down from the platform, crossed the railroad tracks, and then up along the path. On wet grass after rain. Not trampled by yet another summer residents.
They walked and walked and came.
But instead of the expected collapse, they saw a strong house. Behind a high solid fence.
They walked around the house. Then we carefully climbed over the fence from the forest side.
What they saw inside defies description. Rabbits were frolicking in the barn. An unknown breed of bird was walking around the area. Similar to turkeys, but with huge tails, like bouquets of flowers.
Peacocks,” said the Fox. - I saw them abroad. Every feather is worth its weight in gold.
The tail is the tail,” Kuzma said. - There is no meat on it, no fat. An ordinary broom.
“Eh,” Lisa just sighed.
Grandmother was not at home. Two wide tracks led from the stone garage to the gate. With a clear ribbed pattern.
Has our granny driven away? - said the Wolf. - To the dance.
“Well, you have order,” said Kuzma. - In our fairy tales, grandmothers sit at home. The grandchildren are babysat. They are waiting for us, Volkov. If you want to eat, go straight to her. She's always at home. You won't go hungry. And you...
The wolf suddenly felt offended that Kuzma didn’t like everything here.
But here,” said the Wolf, “hunters don’t shoot at you.” We have animal protection. And there are veterinarians. If it gets bad, you can come to the zoo. There will always be food there.
Kuzma was taken aback by such speeches.
The wolf - to the zoo?
Yes! If there is nothing to eat.
Calm down, guys,” said Lisa. - We must hurry. Until our beloved granddaughter arrived.
They entered the house. It was even more interesting inside than outside. There was a Japanese TV in the corner, and a VCR to the left of it. The parquet floors reflected a crystal chandelier.
What a mansion,” said Kuzma. - In our fairy tales, only kings live like this.
“And here,” said the Wolf, “this is how the simplest workers of the village live.”
The fox took a gray piece of paper from the table. It was a telegram.
Dear grandmother!
Please don't die. Wait for me. I'll be there soon.
Your Bunny.
“I see,” Kuzma said. - I went to the city. For hotels.
What kind of gifts?
The wolf stood by the open refrigerator:
There are so many of them here!
Kuzma took a red plastic bottle.
What is this?
“Sauce,” said the Fox. - Tomato.
For meat.
What lordship! Spoil the meat.
They sat down on a wide sofa covered in velvet cushions. The sofa was so soft that I didn’t want to get up.
Yes, - said the Wolf. - And what haven’t I seen in the city? I wish I could live here and live. The air is fresh. The food is natural. I would quit smoking. What else do you need?
Hare! - Kuzma said. - We need a hare!
“I have a plan,” said Lisa. - You, Kuzma, hide in the closet. And you, Wolf, go to the refrigerator. Granny comes. Opens the closet. And there is Kuzma. He stands and is silent. Like a ghost. The granny understands that “it’s crazy.” Goes to the refrigerator. Behind the drops. Opens. And there is the Wolf. And he is also silent. The granny is clear. All we have to do is wait for the arrival of our beloved Bunny.
Great plan! - Kuzma approved. - And you, Lisa? Where will you be?
I'll be on duty. Next to you. On the roof of the barn.
Not too far?
No. Why bother you?
The noise of a motor was heard.
A huge jeep drove up to the gate.
A car horn sounded and the gate opened by itself.
Granny drove into the yard. She jumped to the ground.
The fox was amazed by her strong figure. From a distance, from the roof - well, just a woman in the prime of her life.
The granny, suspecting nothing, entered the house.
There was dead silence in the house for several minutes.
The fox was glad how well her plan was being implemented.
But suddenly screams were heard. Bolt. The sound of breaking dishes. The house shook as if an earthquake had started.
“Why is she doing this?” thought the Fox. “An elderly woman...”
And as soon as she thought this, the granny came out of the house. Healthy and unharmed. She jumped into her jeep and drove off.
The fox rushed into the house.
She saw a terrible picture.
Kuzma was lying on the bench with a swollen face. His eyes were closed.
And the Wolf sprawled out on grandma’s sofa. His eyes were open. But they were looking in different directions.
Lisa started with him.
She poured a whole bucket of water on his head.
She has a black belt. Karate,” said the Wolf.
Where did she go? - asked Lisa.
For medical help,” said Volk. - For the victims. For us that is.
The fox looked out the window after her grandmother had left, and saw a Bunny there.
He was in a hurry, almost running. I was afraid of being late to see my dying grandmother.
Bunny! Hare!
The Fox threw a blanket over the Wolf. She pulled his grandmother's cap over his head.
Kuzma was pushed back into the closet.
Without knowing anything, the Bunny entered the house.
The first thing he saw was “grandmother”. She was lying on the sofa, covered with a blanket up to her chin. She had a cap on her head and a huge nose stuck out.
Grandmother! - shouted the Bunny. - What happened to you? Why is your nose so big?
“Runny nose,” the Wolf said barely audibly.
It's not scary. I'll warm your milk.
“I’d like a beer,” whispered the Wolf.
With what, with what?
With a honey,” the Wolf corrected himself and pulled the blanket even more over himself.
And then at the other end, from under the blanket, huge wolf legs appeared.
Grandmother! - Bunny gasped. - What big legs you have!
“Complication,” the Wolf mumbled. - After the flu.
Nothing. This will pass. You will wear felt boots.
Should I take away my felt boots? - The Wolf was scared.
What boots? You don't hear very well, grandma.
“Sy-yshu, vo-uchek, sy-yshu,” said the Wolf from under the blanket.
What did you say?
I HEAR! - the Wolf barked and threw off the blanket.
Oh! What big teeth you have! - The Bunny was scared.
And this,” Kuzma came out of his hiding place, you know why. We need teeth to eat people like you... Delicious and young Bunnies!
The bunny backed away and wanted to jump out the window. But the shutters outside slammed shut. Lisa was there.
He tried to rush through the door, but his foot hit an empty bucket.
The fox tied the bag with ropes. The bag was dragged out of the hut. They threw me over a high fence. We moved on our own.
And they dragged the Bunny towards the forest.
Chapter Twelve
ANOTHER FOX PLAN
Kuzma felt at home in the forest.
Everything here was familiar, dear. And the mighty ones ate. And soft, pine-strewn paths. And the mounds of blackened snow that have not melted after the winter.
Kuzma came to his senses. He took off his tired clothes. And he threw the sewer clearing, which almost stuck him forever to the stone floor of the station, over the treetops.
He finally got down on all fours. And he ran freely ahead.
Eh, good-good!
“You’re wrong,” the Wolf tried to joke. - Very good!
In fact, the Wolf didn't feel that way. He didn't like this forest, gloomy and alarming. I didn’t like the puddles - I had to jump over them every now and then. I didn’t like that he was the only one carrying the bag with the Hare. And in general... He didn’t like everything.
That's where! - Kuzma said and bared his fangs.
After the rain, fog hung in the forest. It smelled as if the forest had been perfumed with pine cologne. Trees emerged from the fog unexpectedly, and you had to dodge so as not to collide with them head-on.
Finally they came to a small clearing.
That’s it,” Kuzma said. - We've arrived. Here we will get even with the Bunny.
What are you, Kuzma? - The Wolf was scared. - For this, you know?
Who saw it? Who are the witnesses?
“I have a plan,” said the Wolf.
Last. Last plan, Kuzma. Let's beat this little bunny. For everything! For the cabbage. For the carrot. For our grandfathers, who were lost without guilt. For your father, who died from a goat. For my dad, the idiot. So that the Hares remember. All times and peoples. Forever and ever!
That's all? - Kuzma asked sarcastically.
What else?
And the fact is that I have a different plan. Now we’ll build a fire under that tree over there. You, brother, will collect birch firewood. And you, dear... - Kuzma turned to Fox: - Cones and grass. For a fragrant haze. And we are for his sweet soul... With great pleasure...
“You know, Kuzma,” said Lisa. - Don't get excited. You're right, of course. You are a desperate man. I love these. But think calmly. Well, we'll eat it. One for three. What next?
Wouldn't it be better, dear, to take a ransom for him? His grandmother is rich. We'll need twenty thousand. In currency. We will provide for ourselves and our children.
And it's true! - said the Wolf. - Great plan. And you don't have to work. All my life.
Think about it, Kuzma. This money is enough for many hares.
Said no!
You will return to your grandmother with more money. “She hasn’t seen such money in her life,” said Lisa. - Fix the hut on chicken legs. Buy shoes for your feet. On the platform. So as not to get wet. You will live and live well and make good money. Like in a fairy tale!
Kuzma thought about it.
I liked the idea of returning to Baba Yaga with money. The old woman doesn’t think anything of him. He reproaches with an extra piece. And here... Who is the extra piece?
Okay, he said, have it your way. But there is one condition. We've been waiting for three days. If there is no ransom, it's over! On the fourth day, I myself, personally... I’ll make a sausage out of it. Clear?
And the Bunny heard everything in his bag.
He said goodbye to both mom and dad. I regretted that I often upset them with fours. That sometimes I didn’t wash the dishes. That I didn’t always do exercises. That the patient never saw his grandmother. That he could have done better, but didn’t. Didn't have time.
And he felt so sad that he almost cried.
"For what? What did I do wrong?"
He probably would have cried. But then the Wolf sat down on the bag.
The bunny clenched his teeth in pain.
Chapter Thirteen
GRANDSON - GO TO BBQ!
In the morning, grandma found a note under the door:
“Dear granny! If you are not a fool, put 20 thousand under the snag to the left of the bridge. Or your granddaughter will become a kebab.
We wait three days, and not an ounce more.
"DABRA-ZHILATILI"
Grandmother immediately understood who these “dabra-zhilatili” were.
She saw the wolf and Kuzma. And I guessed about Lisa. For the gold earring she lost.
What to do? Go to the police? The police have a lot of things to do. They are still looking for last year's calf. They search and search but cannot find.
No. We need to help our granddaughter out on our own.
Grandmother has long been accustomed to doing everything on her own. Milk cows, plant potatoes, coat apple trees. So that they are not chewed by other, wild hares.
Everything worked out for her and worked out.
She was the first in the area to breed rabbits.
Once I sold a bag of potatoes to summer residents and bought two rabbits. Husband and wife. A few months later, babies appeared in the rabbit family. Rabbits too. The kids grew up quickly, and they began to have children themselves.
At first my grandmother was very happy. "The more kids, the better!" She knew all the rabbits by sight. She called everyone by name. It just seems that the rabbits are the same. In fact, some have a slightly longer left ear, while others have a slightly longer right ear. Some are cocky, others are calm. Some are cheerful, others are sad - no matter how much you scratch their ears and tell them fairy tales.
But every month there were more and more rabbits. Grandma didn’t know where to go from them. They rushed around the site, jumped around the hut, slept in her bed.
“No,” the grandmother decided, “you can’t live like this! Soon these rabbits will drive me out of my own house.”
And no matter how hard it was for her, she sold half of the rabbits. And with the money raised, she built a large barn. For the rest. So that there is enough space for everyone.
The rabbits noticed that the grandmother was very worried about the sold rabbits. She loved them so much. And they began to have children even faster. And soon there were even more of them than before.
My grandmother had to buy a neighboring plot and build new home and build a high fence to prevent rabbits from taking over someone else's territory.
Where did she get the money for this? I had to sell the rabbits again.
But this time too, the rabbits quickly regained their ranks. And again there was little room for them.
Then the grandmother got angry with the rabbits and began breeding peacocks. Peacocks don't reproduce that quickly. And peacock feathers, as Lisa correctly said, are very valuable. They fall out of peacock tails on their own. Just have time to select and sell on the market.
Grandma got a lot of money. She bought a powerful Jeep car. It is easier to drive to the market on country roads with such a car. And to prevent the car from being stolen, she mastered karate techniques. And at regional competitions in this sport she won the main prize - “Black Belt”. It's like being a chess grandmaster.
From playing sports, my grandmother became prettier and younger. It was now difficult to call her a grandmother. She started watching films about love. And she bought a large Japanese TV to better see how they kiss there. And a video. To watch some kisses again later.
And the fact that she smelled like manure was stupid. The Wolf came up with this idea out of envy. Grandma always smelled of only expensive perfume!
This is what a wonderful Hare with a capital B our grandmother was!
And when the time came to save her granddaughter, she was not the least bit confused. I brewed my favorite and very useful herbal tea, took out from the shelf the reference book “How to defeat a wolf in rural and off-road conditions.” I drank one cup, another... A third... At the same time, without stopping, I read the reference book.
Finally, grandma slammed the directory shut. She placed an empty fifth cup of tea on it.
Hooray! She had a rescue plan!
Chapter fourteen
THE VERDICT IS FINAL, NOT SUBJECT TO APPEAL
Meanwhile, in the forest, in an abandoned bear den, they were waiting for ransom.
The den was found by accident. The wolf stepped on a root and fell through. A den, of course, is not an apartment with all the amenities, but it is better in a den than in the open air.
A day passed, two days passed, and still there was no ransom.
The third one has arrived.
This third morning Kuzma woke up just before dawn. All night he was tormented by nightmares, dreaming of the Three Little Pigs and the Goat. Dad died abroad. In addition to all his dreams, the Wolf was snoring. What Kuzma didn’t do! And he pulled his leg and put a cobblestone on his chest - nothing helped.
The fox also did not get enough sleep, although she slept in the fresh air. She stuck her head out of the den, the rest spent the night at home.
And the Bunny didn’t sleep at all. Tied hand and foot, against a cold wall. Don't turn around, don't move.
Rise! - Kuzma shouted and crawled out.
There were frosts at night. The grass, bushes - everything is covered in white frost. Almost like winter.
What a frost,” said the Fox. - Brrr! I can't stand this nature!
But for me,” said the Wolf, “at least it didn’t exist at all.”
But for me,” said Kuzma, “it would be better if you weren’t here, my wonderful friends...
He stretched until he crunched and straightened up:
I'll go to the snag... Maybe they planted some money.
Go, go,” said the Fox. - It's high time.
It's time - not time, but get out of the yard! - joked the Wolf.
Kuzma did not smile.
He ran at a trot along the hard, cold path and thought about his fate as a wolf.
“It was good before,” thought Kuzma. “Baba Yaga, although greedy, was fair. She divided everything equally. Either the calf would be caught.
And suddenly Kuzma stopped.
There were flags hanging right in front of him. Reds. Both right and left. Flags surrounded him; they seemed to encircle the entire forest.
Kuzma tried to step over, but it didn’t work. I ran up to jump over - it was scary. With his mind he understands that this is nonsense, these are just red rags. But he can’t do anything.
"Oh, you damned ones!"
And Kuzma rushed back with all his might.
What's happened? - asked Lisa.
Flags! - Kuzma shouted.
What checkboxes?
Reds!
And what? - asked Lisa.
Like what? There are flags everywhere! From all sides!
But you can step over it,” said Lisa.
I tried it. It doesn't work!
“Here they are, the heroes,” said the Fox. - Predators. Thunderstorm of calves and village chickens. As for the matter... I was afraid of the red rags.
Who was scared?! I?!
You, you. Hillbilly.
Kuzma grabbed her by the scruff of the neck:
Am I the hillbilly? I'll show you the hillbilly! Build a fire!
Wait, brother. “Don’t get excited,” the Wolf tried to calm him down.
But Kuzma didn’t hear anyone now.
He dived into the den. And he immediately surfaced back with a sharp knife. He stuck it hard into a birch trunk. He disappeared again. He dragged the Hare out of the den. He dragged him to the same birch tree and leaned him against his back.
Let's refresh it here! And the fire is there, on a hillock. It's drier there. Let's smoke it a little. And what we don’t eat, we take with us. Three days is enough. The nights are cold, it won't go bad. What do you think about everything?
Both the Fox and the Wolf did not dare to object. Kuzma was really scary when he was angry.
I think like you, Kuzma,” said the Wolf.
And I think so,” said Lisa. - As everyone thinks, so do I. I'll go collect some firewood. Dry. I noticed it nearby. Dry-dry.
And she went. The wolf understood where she went. She went out of her way. And she did the right thing.
And you, brother,” Kuzma said to the Wolf, “melt the snow and prepare the bag.” For meat.
Kuzma approached the Bunny and felt it.
Young. The meat is so tender. Sweet liver. No worse than chicken.
He swallowed his saliva.
I'll go relieve myself. Before eating.
And he went towards the young fir tree.
The Wolf looked at the Bunny. He looked pitiful.
“Here he sits now,” thought the Wolf, “alive. And in half an hour there will be not a Hare, but a hare sausage. Creepy.”
“Wolf, and Wolf,” the Bunny suddenly said. - Wipe my nose.
The wolf looked towards the spruce tree: could Kuzma see? He tore off the bottom of his shirt.
Blow your nose here. Stronger!
Thank you, Wolf.
The bunny completely wilted.
Got a cold?
I'd like you to have a warm beer. With raspberries.
I don't drink beer.
In vain. Beer cures all diseases! I would drink beer... I wouldn't be sitting here now. Otherwise - cabbage, carrots... The textbooks are different. So I jumped.
What do textbooks have to do with it?
And at the same time. Build yourself! Both you and your bespectacled daddy... All of you. Bunnies! I can't see you!
The bunny remained silent.
Goodbye Wolf.
Say hi to mom. And to dad. I feel very sorry for them. Mom will cry. She can't. Her heart is sick.
Why isn't she getting treatment?
Once. She has three groups of kids.
Health is more important! - said the Wolf.
And he fell silent. I realized that I said something stupid.
Better yet,” said the Bunny, “don’t say anything.” Let them think that I will be found.
How can you find it! Only your horns and legs will be found...
The wolf again presented a terrible picture.
You know what, Hare...
The wolf looked towards the spruce tree. He pulled the knife out of the birch tree.
The bunny shuddered.
Don't be afraid!
He pulled back the ropes... Rraz! Two! And there are no ropes.
The bunny didn't understand.
Wherever your eyes look!
And you?.. Kuzma will not forgive this.
Forgive me. Where will it go?
The wolf poked the Bunny towards the forest.
No, said the Bunny. - I can't.
And rightly so! And well done! - Kuzma’s voice suddenly rang out. - You can't run far from me.
Kuzma is back a long time ago. Having unnoticeably circled the clearing, he hid in the bushes and from there watched with pleasure the scene taking place.
So, brother, this is what you are like! Together with the Hares! With whom, with whom? Happy Hare!!!
The wolf fell to his knees.
Sorry, Kuzma!
You don't have my forgiveness!
Kuzma broke the tree. With a sharp knife he began to cut off branches from it.
I'll have to start with you, brother! Now we’ll put you on this Christmas tree. Let's smoke it over a cheerful fire. Let's brown it... Hare! How do you deal with traitors?
The hare remained silent.
Kuzma wrapped the Wolf in ropes.
If a friend betrayed you... Not even a friend, but a brother... You trusted him, but he betrayed you. Does he deserve to die? What do you think? Well? Speak!
If a true friend... And betrayed... I would... I would not forgive.
Well done! - Kuzma was delighted. - Maybe I'll have mercy on you. Collect firewood!
The bunny reluctantly stood up and picked up a couple of dry branches.
You’re doing the right thing by valuing your life,” Kuzma said. - There is only one life, but there are many traitors.
Yes, - said the Bunny. - And mom is alone.
Good son.
Kuzma turned to the Wolf:
Have you heard? That's how it is with the Hares! How parents are loved! Not like ours. Learn while you live.
I won't! - the Wolf said angrily. - I haven’t studied for ages and before I die I won’t!
He now looked at the Bunny with hatred.
Sorry,” said the Bunny. - I feel sorry for mom. Very. And dad. Mom's heart is sick.
And me? Don't you feel sorry for me?
Why feel sorry for you? Just “Well, wait a minute!” I heard it from you! All my life. "Well, wait a minute!" yes "Well, wait a minute!"
Right! - Kuzma said. - You can feel sorry for a friend. Who are you to him? Not a friend, but an enemy! Both for him and for me. You are a traitor!
The bunny approached the young birch tree.
Hey Kuzma! Let's break this birch tree.
The birch tree gives off the most fragrant smoke. Grandma spoke.
The bunny pulled the lower branch. He bent the birch tree to the ground. But she did not give in, she was springy.
The bunny hung on a branch. The top bent. Almost to the ground.
Help, Kuzma!
Kuzma came up. Jumped. He grabbed the top with his paws.
The birch tree bent under his weight all the way to the ground. The birch trunk bent like a bow. And then the Bunny let go of the branch.
The birch, having gotten rid of excess weight, straightened up with a whistle, Kuzma flew up, could not resist...
And flew over the forest like an arrow from a bow!
The Bunny waved his knife - the ropes on the Wolf burst.
And now - let's run!
“Hare,” was all the Wolf said.
What did you think?
And they rushed away from the forest.
Chapter fifteen
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
Kuzma rose from the ground and shook himself off.
“No, my dears. You won’t get rid of me that easily!”
And with giant leaps he set off in pursuit. He flew through the forest, almost without touching the ground. His eyes unmistakably discerned a broken twig, trampled grass - the traces of the Wolf and the Hare.
"You're lying! You won't leave!! There was one sausage, there will be two!"
Anger, resentment, and thirst for revenge multiplied my strength. He felt that he was catching up. Just a little more! Just a little more! His nostrils caught the scent of the fugitives.
And here they are. Ahead, between the trees, clothes flashed.
He pressed some more.
The last two jumps... FOX!
Where did you come from!?
Kuzma! Oh, Kuzma!
The fox trembled with fear:
Me?.. I'm getting some brushwood, Kuzma. For brushwood.
For what brushwood?!
For dry, Kuzma. For dry.
Where are the Hare and the Wolf?
I didn’t see it, Kuzma. I swear.
Ahhh! - Kuzma growled.
He threw Lisa aside.
It turns out he was just wasting time.
Let's go! Again - in pursuit!
The Bunny and the Wolf ran out of the forest.
The river meandered in front of them. A rickety wooden bridge spanned the river. Behind the bridge, on a hill, is a village. Blue sky, white clouds. Log cabins in the sunshine look like toys. There are our own. Grandma, police. If only I had time...
They rolled down the slope.
The bridge swayed from side to side under their weight... Oh! What is this?
The boards in the middle of the bridge broke. Sharp broken edges stuck up. You can't cross the bridge now!
And below, under the gap... Behemoth stood knee-deep in the water. The handlebars of a motorcycle were sticking out of the water. The old double-weight bridge could not stand it. A hippopotamus, and on a motorcycle too!
Behemoth looked pitiful. He didn't know what to do.
Come on, Wolf. Jump! - shouted the Bunny. - It's shallow here! Let's swim there!
Afraid! - said the Wolf.
The cracking of branches was heard in the forest. Kuzma jumped ashore.
He immediately assessed the situation:
Gotcha! Handsome guys!
Jump! - Bunny shouted again.
The Bunny did not persuade the Wolf. He simply pushed him into the water.
And he jumped after him.
The wolf couldn't swim. I had to support him, push him. In very cold water.
Come on, Wolf. Come on, honey. Just a little more. Just a little more. Well, please.
I can't. There is no more strength.
The wolf was choking. The wet clothes were pulling down. But the shore was very close.
And on the shore Kuzma was waiting for them with a smile. In one leap he jumped over the gap in the bridge. And now I watched the efforts of the unfortunate swimmers.
“If they swim across, that’s good! There will be someone to settle scores with. But if they don’t swim across... Well, that’s not bad either!”
We swam across. Wet, pitiful, clinging to the bushes, the Wolf and the Hare climbed ashore.
Hello, dears! Hello, beloved ones!
Kuzma greeted them with his mouth wide open. His eyes sparkled bloodthirstyly.
Well? Who should we start with? Who's first?
I! - said the Bunny. - I'm the first.
Very good. But still we will start with you, brother!
Kuzma braced himself, preparing to jump.
Paws up!!! - suddenly a menacing command was heard.
An old woman came out from behind the bushes with a gun at the ready.
She was ready to fire a charge of buckshot at Kuzma, but Bunny managed to shout:
Don't shoot! I'll take him back. To a fairy tale!
Grandmother thought and lowered the gun.
Kuzma rushed to the bridge. Hurry, hurry to the other side of the river. To the forest. Near and dear, saving forest.
And on the other side Behemoth was waiting for him.
Paws up!!!
The barrel of the gun was aimed straight at Kuzma's forehead. This time the Behemoth was wearing glasses. Brand new, just received yesterday. Now he won't miss.
Kuzma threw himself into the water and swam. Faster, faster! From these hated Hares, from the corrupt Wolves.
The current caught him. It carried him along the bend of the river. And from there, from behind the toe, came his strangled and angry cry:
Hare! Hare! Can you hear me?
I hear, I hear,” the Hare waved his hand.
Well, Za-hay... Po-oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
A gust of wind and the noise of the trees prevented Kuzma's last threats from being heard in this book.
The Wolf and the Bunny were sitting over a cliff by the river. With fishing rods.
The wolf went fishing for the first time in his life. Before that, he thought that the roach was floating in the river, dried.
Everyone looked at their float. The sun was reflected in the water, and it was difficult to keep track of the float. He was lost in the glare of the sun.
You know,” said the Bunny, “Wolves can be good too.”
They happen,” said the Wolf.
The Hare took the bait. He jerked the rod. There was a silver roach on the hook.
The bunny took it off the hook and threw it into the bucket. There were about ten of the same beauties swimming there.
Why does it bite for you, but not for me? - asked the Wolf. - Let's change fishing rods.
“Come on,” said the Bunny and handed his to the Wolf: “Here.”
And he himself took Wolf’s fishing rod and cast it too.
And then the Hare took the wolf’s bait again.
The wolf looked at the new swimmer with envy.
No, he said, something is wrong here. Let me cast the fishing rod myself.
He pulled the hook with the worm out of the water, but miscalculated. The hook caught on a bush.
The wolf began to tug at the fishing rod, trying to unhook the hook. The line tightened.
Wait! - the Hare tried to stop him.
But the Wolf didn’t hear anyone now. He was angry at the Hare, at his luck, at this fishing, at everything in the world.
He pulled with all his might. The fishing line broke, and he himself, unable to keep his balance, flew into the water.
The bunny wanted to help him get out of the water.
But the Wolf looked at him angrily.
No. There are no good Hares... There are no such things. No!
And, taking in more air into his lungs, he shouted to the whole area:
WELL, HARNES, WAIT!
HELLO GUYS!
You've probably seen the movie "WELL, WAIT!"
About the Wolf and the Hare.
In this book you will also meet the Wolf and the Hare.
But not only with them.
Also with the Bunny’s parents - his father is a doctor and his mother is a teacher.
And with his grandmother, a farmer.
And with the deceiver Lisa.
And with a real Gray Wolf from a real fairy tale.
Whose name is Kuzma.
And with Baba Yaga, also real.
And with Behemoth, who became one of the main participants in our history.
And with many other heroes.
You probably guessed it?
Yes! This book is about the BRAND NEW, UNKNOWN ADVENTURES OF THE WOLF AND THE HARE.
Now two Wolves are chasing our Bunny.
And I won’t say how it all ends. Otherwise, you will not be interested in reading the book.
Chapter One
WHY DO NOT WOLVES LIKE HARES?
The bunny lived in an ordinary large-block house.
In the same way as many of his fellow citizens: Deer, Hippos, Rams, Badgers, Bears, Goats. Workers and employees, writers and scientists, businessmen and...
No. Businessmen did not live in such houses. And if they lived, they were not very respectable.
In winter, snowflakes flew into the cracks between the blocks. And you could ski in the rooms. And in the summer the blocks got so hot that it was easy to fry cutlets on them. Press with the back of the pan and fry. The cutlets sizzled and splashed fat in all directions. But they turned out very tasty. Can't compare with any restaurants. It was getting hot in the apartment - no need to go south. Dive into your bath, if there is water, and consider that you are on the sea coast. And if there is no water, it’s also not scary. Can be dialed during rain. The roof leaked so much that on any floor there was knee-deep water.
A large-block house is good for everyone!
But most importantly, he teaches residents to overcome difficulties!
It was in such a house, on the third floor, that Bunny lived.
The Bunny's family was small but hardworking.
His mother, Zaychikha, worked as a kindergarten teacher. And dad, Hare, is a doctor in a children's clinic. Both dad and mom raised and treated other people's children. They did not have enough time for their own son. So the Bunny had to take care of himself. Wash your hands before eating, cook soup from bags, brush your shoes and teeth.
All this taught him to be independent.
And if you remember that Bunny lived in a large-block house, then it becomes clear where he got his dexterity, ingenuity and ability to find a way out of the most difficult situations.
On that ill-fated day when our story began, the Bunny did not think about anything bad. Summer was ahead, the holidays. A trip to visit grandma in the village. The screams of children from their mother’s kindergarten could be heard through the window. It smelled like medicine from my dad's clinic. At such moments you think only about good things. That you are healthy and you don’t need to be treated by your dad. And that you are already an adult. You don't have to go to your mom's kindergarten.
“Summer, ah, summer!.. Red summer, be with me.”
Grandma's village is full of mushrooms. And what fishing!
Eh, it’s good to live in the world!
The only thing that spoiled the mood was the Wolf. From the second entrance. A notorious hooligan. All his life he studied in the third grade, and smoked from the first. As soon as he sees the Bunny, immediately follow him! I had to not yawn and quickly move away.
Then, having caught his breath, Bunny thought:
"What did I do wrong to him?" Or: “Why don’t Wolves like us?”
He asked dad and mom. But they avoided a direct answer.
"When you grow up big, you'll know."
“The main thing, son, is to study well.”
One day the Bunny decided to make friends with the Wolf. I bought his favorite dromedary camel cigarettes.
He held out and said:
Smoke. This is for you.
The wolf took the cigarettes. I lit a cigarette. And then he looked at the Bunny in a bad way:
Do you know that smoking is harmful?
“I know,” said the Bunny.
You know, but you’re slipping it to me. Do you want to poison?
What do you? - said the Bunny. - I want to be friends with you.
The wolf grinned:
Then - on. Light up.
And he handed the pack to the Bunny.
“It’s too early for me,” said the Bunny. - My mother doesn’t allow me.
“And I allow it,” said the Wolf. - So tell your mom.
What was to be done? The bunny took a cigarette.
The wolf clicked his lighter. He brought the flame to his very face:
Come on, come on. Take a drag!
The bunny inhaled thick acrid smoke. It was as if a bomb had exploded inside him.
He coughed. The cigarette shot out of his mouth like a rocket from a launcher.
The wolf screamed, throwing off her burning debris.
The Bunny no longer tried to make friends with the Wolf. When she sees his stooped figure, legs in hands - and full speed ahead!
The bunny got up from the sofa and went to the balcony. "Can you see the Wolf?"
No, it doesn't seem to be visible. You can go for a walk.
Oh! He forgot to water the flowers! Mom asked.
The bunny returned to the room. I took a watering can from the kitchen. I filled it with water from a special jar “For flowers”.
He went out onto the balcony again.
And how many weeds there are among the flowers!
He placed the watering can on the concrete floor. He returned to the room again. I found my mother's scissors that she used to cut weeds.
And the Bunny did not see that the Wolf had been watching him from behind the bushes for a long time. That he tore the clothesline off the poles. He threw it like a lasso over the television antenna. And climbs up it, onto his balcony. And he whistles another song:
"If... a friend... suddenly appeared..."
Bunny didn't see any of this. He was busy: he was cutting off the insolent weeds.
“What kind of weed is this? Thick as a rope! It doesn’t belong here!”
Bunny - right! And he cut it off.
And it really was a rope.
And the Wolf flew down! Straight into a police wheelchair.
Perhaps he would not have ended up in the carriage. But just at that moment the blind Behemoth was crossing the street.
He went to order glasses. On the ground floor of the large-block building there was a pharmacy, specializing in glasses. And Behemoth had a recipe. According to which, as a pensioner, he was entitled to free glasses at this special pharmacy.
And he walked, rejoicing that soon he would be able to see everything well with his new glasses. Even your small pension.
But now he was without glasses and did not see the motorcycle.
The motorcycle squealed on its brakes, swerved sharply to the side and drove onto the sidewalk. Just where the Wolf fell.
That's why the Wolf landed right in the police wheelchair.
If it weren't for Behemoth, he would never have gotten there.
And that’s why the Wolf shouted with all his might to the whole street:
WELL, BEHEMOTH, WAIT!
Chapter two
SERGEANT MEDVEDEV
Sergeant Medvedev was happy. The Wolf has finally been caught. The same one. Who ate my grandmother too. And "Little Red Riding Hood". And seven kids. And he was going to eat three unfortunate piglets.
To jail!
In vain did the Wolf argue:
I didn’t eat anyone, citizen boss. For meat, I prefer fish. With beer. Vobla, canned herring. And for the little goats... Or the grandmothers?! Who do you take me for?
But Medvedev did not believe the Wolves. He believed only in the rules. And also to Captain Mishkin. But Captain Mishkin was ill. And in the charter it was clearly written: “No matter how much you feed the Wolf, everything looks into the forest.”
In other words, you can’t trust Wolves either in the forest or in the city.
The next day, in the morning, Bunny's dad, a doctor, unfolded the newspaper.
“Finally,” he said, “the Wolf was caught.”
God bless! - Mom was happy. - One less bully.
The newspaper published the following message:
A seasoned criminal has been caught. Nicknamed "Grey". In the interests of the investigation, we do not disclose details. But as we learned: the Wolf, nicknamed “Grey,” attacked his victims unexpectedly. Changed his voice to that of a goat. He put a red cap on his head. We ask the Three Little Pigs and the Seven Little Goats to appear as witnesses. And although there has not been a trial yet, the verdict is known.
HELLO GUYS!
You've probably seen the movie "WELL, WAIT!"
About the Wolf and the Hare.
In this book you will also meet the Wolf and the Hare.
But not only with them.
Also with the Bunny’s parents - his father is a doctor and his mother is a teacher.
And with his grandmother, a farmer.
And with the deceiver Lisa.
And with a real Gray Wolf from a real fairy tale.
Whose name is Kuzma.
And with Baba Yaga, also real.
And with Behemoth, who became one of the main participants in our history.
And with many other heroes.
You probably guessed it?
Yes! This book is about the BRAND NEW, UNKNOWN ADVENTURES OF THE WOLF AND THE HARE.
Now two Wolves are chasing our Bunny.
And I won’t say how it all ends. Otherwise, you will not be interested in reading the book.
Chapter One
WHY DO NOT WOLVES LIKE HARES?
The bunny lived in an ordinary large-block house.
In the same way as many of his fellow citizens: Deer, Hippos, Rams, Badgers, Bears, Goats. Workers and employees, writers and scientists, businessmen and...
No. Businessmen did not live in such houses. And if they lived, they were not very respectable.
In winter, snowflakes flew into the cracks between the blocks. And you could ski in the rooms. And in the summer the blocks got so hot that it was easy to fry cutlets on them. Press with the back of the pan and fry. The cutlets sizzled and splashed fat in all directions. But they turned out very tasty. Can't compare with any restaurants. It was getting hot in the apartment - no need to go south. Dive into your bath, if there is water, and consider that you are on the sea coast. And if there is no water, it’s also not scary. Can be dialed during rain. The roof leaked so much that on any floor there was knee-deep water.
A large-block house is good for everyone!
But most importantly, he teaches residents to overcome difficulties!
It was in such a house, on the third floor, that Bunny lived.
The Bunny's family was small but hardworking.
His mother, Zaychikha, worked as a kindergarten teacher. And dad, Hare, is a doctor in a children's clinic. Both dad and mom raised and treated other people's children. They did not have enough time for their own son. So the Bunny had to take care of himself. Wash your hands before eating, cook soup from bags, brush your shoes and teeth.
All this taught him to be independent.
And if you remember that Bunny lived in a large-block house, then it becomes clear where he got his dexterity, ingenuity and ability to find a way out of the most difficult situations.
On that ill-fated day when our story began, the Bunny did not think about anything bad. Summer was ahead, the holidays. A trip to visit grandma in the village. The screams of children from their mother’s kindergarten could be heard through the window. It smelled like medicine from my dad's clinic. At such moments you think only about good things. That you are healthy and you don’t need to be treated by your dad. And that you are already an adult. You don't have to go to your mom's kindergarten.
“Summer, ah, summer!.. Red summer, be with me.”
Grandma's village is full of mushrooms. And what fishing!
Eh, it’s good to live in the world!
The only thing that spoiled the mood was the Wolf. From the second entrance. A notorious hooligan. All his life he studied in the third grade, and smoked from the first. As soon as he sees the Bunny, immediately follow him! I had to not yawn and quickly move away.
Then, having caught his breath, Bunny thought:
"What did I do wrong to him?" Or: “Why don’t Wolves like us?”
He asked dad and mom. But they avoided a direct answer.
"When you grow up big, you'll know."
“The main thing, son, is to study well.”
One day the Bunny decided to make friends with the Wolf. I bought his favorite dromedary camel cigarettes.
He held out and said:
Smoke. This is for you.
The wolf took the cigarettes. I lit a cigarette. And then he looked at the Bunny in a bad way:
Do you know that smoking is harmful?
“I know,” said the Bunny.
You know, but you’re slipping it to me. Do you want to poison?
What do you? - said the Bunny. - I want to be friends with you.
The wolf grinned:
Then - on. Light up.
And he handed the pack to the Bunny.
“It’s too early for me,” said the Bunny. - My mother doesn’t allow me.
“And I allow it,” said the Wolf. - So tell your mom.
What was to be done? The bunny took a cigarette.
The wolf clicked his lighter. He brought the flame to his very face:
Come on, come on. Take a drag!
The bunny inhaled thick acrid smoke. It was as if a bomb had exploded inside him.
